Happy induction day.

Posted on July 1, 2021 by rashellovesricky

Well today was supposed to be induction day. I didn’t make it to today and I have very mixed feelings about it. On one hand I’m so happy he’s here safe and sound. I can’t help but to be a little sad though that it was due to me being told I had pre eclampsia. 😔 5 pregnancies and now this happened. I was shocked I felt fine! It was a regular Thursday I had my drs appointment where everything was FINE. They checked me and I was only like 2cm and baby was still high up. We laughed and knew he would make it to induction day today. I was feeling fine other then my swelling that only seemed to happen when I stood for too long. I came home and installed a toilet with my dad and then I took a bath that night. I had no contractions all day. Then bam at like 9:30 or 10:00 they started and after about 30 mins of me feeling like they were consistent I decided to download a contraction timer and time them.

Well they were coming every 3 mins! This was happening for about an hour and a half so Ricky was not going to let me not go to the hospital. If it had been up to me I would have probably stayed until they were more intense. I dislike being in the hospital sitting in a bed and probably being sent home. 😆 So I curled my hair and did my makeup because well I can’t look a mess. I told J and K I would let them know but I was going to be checked. They had me pee and hooked me up to the monitors. I was super dehydrated they said. (As usual I never drink enough water…) So I was getting IV fluids and I figured they would send me home.

They also took my blood pressure and she asked if it had been running high. I said no I’ve never had a high reading that I know of. I knew then something was not good. She of course said it was no big deal and they would check again in a little bit but I just knew something was off when I’ve never had a high reading. They said they would run a blood sample to check things too. The on call dr came back in and said how would you like to have a baby today. She was very cheerful about it. I knew better. 😢 I said well not if it’s because you think I have pre eclampsia. She said sorry but they wouldn’t let me leave because of it. I cried. I was worried about baby LB and me. I asked them to re test my pee after I was hydrated but they said it wouldn’t matter. I was confused because I felt totally fine and normal. I was disappointed that my body was not doing what it was supposed to do. I’m a pro pregnant person this isn’t supposed to happen to me! But good news he was head down!!!

I called J to let her know, she took it way better then I did. They started booking flights! Dr Sammons was not on call and it was a different dr from the wentzville office. Someone I had never met. He was all about putting me on pitosin and breaking my water immediately. I was a FIRM NO! My last labor I let them break my water and I felt like it was too soon. They insisted that once that happens labor would go quickly. That didn’t happen and they almost gave me c section because my water was broken for so long and I wasn’t progressing fast enough to push. (Thankfully my nurses rallied for me and I made it last time) This time I wasn’t going to repeat that! They also wanted me to get the epidural before they broke my water… I didn’t want to because then I knew I would be stuck in bed. Now I’m definitely Pro epidural! I’ve always had an epidural so I wasn’t against getting it. I just didn’t want to get it if I wasn’t in pain yet. The nurse kept telling me i could do what I wanted, but that if I didn’t get it and things went quickly then it would be hard to get relief. So I caved and got it. I don’t want to say I regret it but I will say I was right and nothing happened quickly! I labored for HOURS! Stuck in bed.

I asked the nurse if I could be moving or using a peanut ball etc. She just encouraged me to rest. In the mean time J and K had made it to the hospital. My Dr also called me and said the other on call dr told her well she wouldn’t even let me see her or do anything! Lol Dr Sammons said that sounds like Rashel. I even asked her if I for sure had pre eclampsia or if it could be wrong. She said it wasn’t wrong. Uggg Thankfully the night nurses came in and it was the same girls from last time! 🎉 These girls had me on the peanut ball and hanging my legs off the bed etc to get baby LB to come on down! Thank the lord. During the whole labor thankfully my blood pressure went as stayed down and I didn’t require any medicine for it. (Magnesium) I have only been told terrible things about this medication when laboring. I was very thankful to not need it.

I don’t even remember what time it was but they finally checked me again and I was like 9 and a 1/2cm… I was so tired and hungry I said I bet I can push through a 1/2 cm! Or just do a good membrane sweep. My nurse laughed and said she would tell the Dr but that she thought I could push through it also! Woohoo In came my Dr and she said let’s give it a go! I’m a super pusher I know this about myself 😂. It’s like my pregnancy super power. I feel bad for women who push for an hour plus. I’ve never had to do that thankfully. Baby LB was still pretty high us she said so I was going to have to work for it. I felt like I had been pushing for HOURS. I was tired and kept thinking oh no maybe this is the time I can’t do it. But I kept pushing. Finally they said he was close and before I knew it out he came!

His mom got to grab him right away and I touched his sweet little head! He had such dark hair. He was precious and perfect! He was crying right away too. Those first sweet tiny baby cries are the best. K got to cut the cord and mom did skin to skin. It was perfect. Turns out my pushing of what felt like hours was a crazy 21 mins… 😂 I’m pretty dramatic I guess. I’m not sure how you women have the energy to push longer! You all are incredible!!! We ordered pizza and salad and Ricky got me a soda! It was like 10 pm and we were all exhausted but excited too. I love getting to see J and K with their new baby. That’s literally all it’s about for me! Seeing them love that baby is what I waited 9 plus months for. It makes all the shots, meds, drs appointments, swelling, pushing for 21 mins 😆 etc all worth it! And Leaf if a wonderful big brother. He loves his baby brother so much and J is great at sending me pictures and updates on how life is going with two kids.

After I was released I had to go back to the dr that Monday for a blood pressure check. Thankfully it’s still been good and I didn’t have issues or need medication for it. It seems to be back to normal and all my swelling is gone! I guess I’m thankful to Ricky for making me go to the hospital even though I didn’t want too. If not things could have gotten worse I guess since I didn’t have another appointment until the following week! I’m still shocked that my body has birthed 6 babies! It doesn’t feel real to me. I have been so blessed to have two of my own children and then two more for each of the families. I will always say birthing babies will be the best thing I will have have done in my lifetime. These children will do incredible things in this world. They are all bringing such love, joy and happiness to so many! I have not only been able to help make parents happy but grandparents, cousins, aunts, uncles, God parents, and big Sisters and brothers! My heart will forever be grateful and blessed for this experience. I’m the least emotional girl ever but this part of my life makes me emotional! This chapter of my life has been filled with the most love and joy. I’m not sure if this is the end for me or not but on baby making. 😔 I don’t think I will ever feel ok closing this chapter. This part is hard for me. I want to have babies for EVERYONE! Regardless I’m so blessed and happy to have this chapter in my life. Love is a powerful thing. I love all these babies and these families. This isn’t something everyone can do and that’s ok! I think we can all look for ways to help change the world though. Look for ways to give back! I promise it’s worth it. 🥰

I also have to obviously thank my incredible support team. First up my husband! He doesn’t get enough credit! Not only has he supported me 1,000 billion percent. (But being pregnant with other peoples children is a little different lol) He has picked up the slack when I have been pregnant. He gave ALL the butt shots except for like 3! The first one my cousin Barb showed him how to do it and two Molly had to give when Ricky couldn’t come to Chicago! He deals with the hormones. Lupron rage is real! He has taken care of me after every delivery. Helping me shower, carry IV bags in and out of bathrooms, putting my underwear on me when I can’t bend over, waking me up when I fall asleep on the hospital toilet! 😂 That is an inside joke but yes it actually happened! So so many things. He loves me like crazy and I need to do better at remembering that. 🥰

Then their is my parents! My mom and dad have always watched the kids for every out of town trip I had to make. When I had my C section my parents kept the kids for 5/6 weeks because it was so bad and I couldn’t lift the kids for car seats or Everett for his crib for naps. They came over at crazy hours to get the kids when I would go into labor. They have picked up meds and supplies for me so we would just be able to go home from the hospital. They have sat with me when I couldn’t be alone, taken me to drs appointments. The list goes on. I don’t know what I would have done without that kind of love and support!

We also have my kids! They have sacrificed time with a non pregnant mom. Suffered when I had headaches or mood swings. We have skipped family trips because I couldn’t travel too far. Good comes from this also! My kids think having babies for other people is NORMAL! They ask others who are pregnant who their baby is for. ❤️ I am proud of that.

Welcome to the world sweet baby Oliver! Born at 37 weeks and two days! 6/18/21

5 pounds 15oz of pure perfection.

Watching your wife birth is exhausting… 😂

Making the best of an early birthday party!

Baby Oliver’s little home! This was cool.

My crazy positions and incredible nurses!

30 weeks

Posted on April 29, 2021 by rashellovesricky

30 weeks means only 10 weeks left! Actually we only have 9 or less since Dr Sammons said she would induce us on June 30th if I don’t go before then. On one hand I’m so incredibly excited for J and K and on the other I’m sad that my time is coming to an end with my belly buddy. 🥰 The end of pregnancy is my absolute favorite. I love all the big movements and all the excitement that comes with contractions and labor.

Yesterday at work I was super busy and when I got home I noticed I definitely had some mild swelling in my ankles! This hasn’t happened since I was pregnant with Ellie. I am glad I have only had one pregnancy that swelling was an issue because I can honestly say it sucks. I hate fat sore feet. Thankfully by this morning my feet were just fine.

We had a Dr appointment today and it was an easy quick appointment. We checked on baby and he looks good. He was actually head down today too! Now who knows how long it will last but I really hope this little guy will be extra nice to us all and just stay head down so we have less to worry about. He is definitely quite the mover in there though and I love it. I got some good kicks on video the other day to send to his mom and dad.

I’ve definitely started getting more sleepy again and my major craving is still ice 🧊. I love long naps and lots of trips to the bathroom all day and night. The kids are getting super excited for baby to come too. Kailynn is excited to see him and I’m pretty sure Everett is just excited because he knows we are going back to Disney after baby comes. 😂 I’m pretty excited to go back to Disney too.

It’s so crazy how fast all this goes. I feel like I was just suffering with all the shots and extra hormones. Now looking at how big this guy is getting and knowing soon he will make his grand introduction into this world. I’m excited to see exactly what he looks like. All those little features we see on ultrasound in real life. I just know Mr Leaf is going to be a great big brother. Like most siblings I’m sure he has no idea what’s really in store for him though. 😂 I remember Kailynn was so confused that this new baby was just going to be staying with us every day! That all changes quickly though and then they have a built in best friend.

I’ll post what baby LB is up too now and some new pictures.

Baby LB is growing like crazy, now 16-17 inches, the size of a cantaloupe, and probably weighing somewhere near three and a half pounds. At this point, most babies will start to move from the breech position (head up) to the birth position (head down) where their heads are delivered first. If your healthcare provider says Baby LB doesn’t appear to be moving from the breech position, you can ask them about exercises to encourage Baby LB into a head down birth position. In all likelihood, though, your little one is already rotating towards that birth position as you both move closer to that special day!

How else is your little one developing this week? Baby LB’s lanugo, the furry coat that’s been keeping them warm in the womb, will begin to fall off this week as they put on enough fat to keep them warm without it. Your little one is going to start putting on up to a half pound each week until they’re born — they’ll be far less little in just a few weeks!

Your baby’s eyes are also still developing. And while they can open their eyes, right now their vision is extremely poor. It will continue to improve while Baby LB is in the womb, and soon this development will speed up. They might reach the point of being able to track objects moving horizontally and vertically in just a few short weeks, and by week 34, they’ll probably have vision that’s just as strong as it will be at birth.

What’s new with you?

Around now, you might notice a return of the mood swings you may have thought you left behind in the first trimester. You also might have paradoxical symptoms, like increased tiredness right alongside difficulty sleeping. These issues are common, and the important thing is that you’re three-quarters of the way done with all of these frustrations, and three-quarters of the way to meeting Baby LB.

And as you approach delivery day, it’s increasingly important to start planning for some of the important, practical things in Baby LB’s life, like their nursery or sleep space. The transition from the womb to the world is a pretty drastic one, and you want Baby LB to be in a comfortable and nurturing environment so that they can be as happy and healthy as possible. So it’s also a good time to start thinking about things like where you’re going to get baby supplies, like diapers (you’ll need diapers!), and set up a crib or bassinet if you haven’t already.

If you have a partner, it’s great to include them in all of this prep. It can make for a nice bonding experience for you both and help them prepare for the big change happening in both of your lives — and get used to the idea that they’re going to be changing a LOT of those diapers! This is also a great time for them to spend some quality time with your growing bump, which can be a sweet way for them to nurture their bond with Baby LB even before your little one is born. Let them talk to Baby LB, touch your bump, and try to feel some of your growing baby’s movements so they can appreciate just how huge, and how wonderful, this change in your lives is going to be.

Kailynn took these photos and she wanted me to be a model she said. 🤪

Awe baby kicks

Happy 10 weeks!

Posted on December 9, 2020 by rashellovesricky

As of today we are officially 10 weeks and counting. You may all remember me looking forward to this day so I could stop the meds! Well turns out we are just going to start tapering me off the meds starting today. At least it’s a start! I go next week to get my blood levels taken so they can make sure I can decrease more I guess. I’m so ready to just be a normal pregnant person without all the shots and drugs.

Nothing huge has been going on in my world. Just trying to continue being safe due to covid and staying home as much as possible. Working is the riskiest thing I do 😂. I know we all will be so happy when we can get together and all live again. I can’t wait for more traveling and just being with friends and family.

No major symptoms or anything still. I actually feel like I’m getting my energy back so I’m taking less naps and doing more house work! I’m sure that makes Ricky happy 😆. I will just be so happy when I can finally feel baby move! Since I don’t get major symptoms I just feel feel so much better and safe when I can feel the little reminders that baby is safe. I did bust out of a bra at work last week! The hook on the back just said nope I’m not taking this anymore… The good news is the other hook was a fighter and held on for dear life all day. I guess it was time for some new bras anyway.

Oh and baby boy has a new perfect nickname! His mom and dad are calling him baby LB it stands for Leafs Brother! How adorable is that.

How’s Baby LB?

Baby LB is the size of a kumquat, at about 1 ¼ inches long, and is beginning to develop tiny human features, like teeny tiny bit of hair, the buds of baby teeth, and elbows and other joints that bend. If it’s a boy, his testes are just beginning to produce that ever-so-masculine hormone, testosterone. Because Baby B’s heartbeat – which is super rapid at 145-165 bpm, as much as two to three times as fast as yours – can now be detected, statistics say the chances of a miscarriage are greatly reduced. Baby B’s heart isn’t the only thing moving, either – he is starting to move around enough that it might even be visible in an ultrasound scan, which your healthcare provider may perform at your next appointment.

His digestive system is also functional by this point, transporting food matter to bowels in preparation for that first poop! Excited yet?

How’s mom?

Hopefully by now, most of the emotional turbulence is over, and you’re settling into the heart of your pregnancy. From here on out, you are probably going to start gaining weight at a more rapid rate, and you should keep track of your weight gain to make sure it is in the healthy range.

As far as pregnancy symptoms go, you might notice an increase in vaginal discharge, as well as more visible veins, due to the extra blood being carried to Baby B. In fact, total blood volume in the body may increase between 30 and 50% during pregnancy, and is something to watch carefully if you have a history of cardiac problems, as the increase in the blood being pumped through the heart can put it under strain. The vaginal discharge is nothing to worry about, as long as it’s whitish, thin (or clear, later in your pregnancy), and odorless. Discharge that’s tinged with yellow, green, or has a thick or uneven texture could be a sign of infection.

Visible veins are also a natural physical reaction to the hugely increased blood volume, including both varicose veins, which usually show up as bulky blue veins on the legs, and spider veins, which are smaller clusters of visible blood vessels expanding out from a central point on your face, arms, or chest. Varicose veins can be painful, though spider veins generally aren’t. Both spider and varicose veins have a hereditary component.

Ultrasound again today! 8 weeks.

Posted on November 24, 2020 by rashellovesricky

Well almost I’ll be 8 weeks tomorrow! So today I went in for another ultrasound and I’m always a little nervous before ultrasounds because well it’s early and so many things sadly could go wrong. Plus since I don’t really get many pregnancy symptoms I don’t actually feel much different. I’m always so excited once I can see the baby looks bigger and see the fluttering heartbeat! That will never not amaze me. It’s so incredible and beautiful all at the same time. Just weeks ago they put this tiny ball of cells baby into me and now he has tiny arm and leg buds starting to form! It’s just so hard to believe it can all happen so fast. The love I feel for these little babies is also so amazing to me. You just can’t help it. I have prayed for this little guy before he was ever even in me. I prayed he would thaw out perfectly and that he would be comfortable in my fluffy uterine lining. He’s just a baby miracle and I feel so blessed and lucky to help.

While the ultrasound technician was checking everything I was joking and asked if he was head down yet. 😂 Turns out he is!!! Woohoo 🙌 obviously this boy has plenty of time to wiggle and move about but it was so funny to me since his big brother came out breach! I have literally delivered babies every way possible at this point. I kinda think it’s cool. Oh also his heart rate went up to 163 so that’s great also.

As far as me my headaches are still off and on and Tylenol is working so that’s good. My dreams have went back to normal from what I can tell. My boobs are definitely more tender right now. That really seems to be all that’s going on with me. Oh I do feel like my belly is sticking out more in my lower uterus area! I’m sure it’s because I’ve had 5 previous pregnancies so my uterus is just like here we go again 😆. I also started this time a little heavier then I wanted to with this pregnancy so, I’m sure that helps add to the fluff that’s already there. 🙄

I’m waiting to see what the Dr says about the next steps. I’m assuming he will say I can stop meds at 10 weeks and just be a regular pregnant person!!!!!! You seriously have now idea how happy this will make me. My butt is so ready to not be stabbed anymore. Also I think Ricky will be happy to not have to do it every night. Oh gosh I almost forgot to tell you guys a great story!!! Ricky had his first injury with giving me my shot. He was trying to put the cap back on the needle and stabbed HIMSELF. He’s obviously fine but of course I had to give him crap and tell him that the next day he would feel pregnant from all the hormones that must have been left on the tip of the needle 😆. I’m actually surprised it took this long for him to stab himself with all these years of shots he’s done. I’ll post some pictures to enjoy as well.

This is what baby B has been up to 🥰

Baby B is moving around like a little dancer, even though you can’t feel it. Your baby bulge might start protruding at this time, as your appetite increases to match Baby B’s. The placenta is also picking up its hormone production, giving yours a break. You’ll start to see fewer mood swings soon.

How’s Baby B?

Baby B is in his last few days of embryo-hood, which mostly means that the brand new, teeny tiny internal organs developing under his see-through skin are almost ready to start functioning on their own.

That pesky tail is finally celebrating its last hurrah, and pretty soon it will disappear completely. Baby B’s webbed fingers and toes are poking out from little limbs that are growing longer every day, and facial features are becoming more prominent, as his lips, nose, and eyelids are looking increasingly human-like around now. Your strawberry-sized bundle of joy is also moving around like crazy, although you almost certainly cannot feel it. Baby B’s head, still tiny compared to yours, now makes up half of his total body weight. But don’t worry, all the famous babies have big heads!

First ultrasound one baby or two???

Posted on November 13, 2020 by rashellovesricky

I’ll start with sadly J and K didn’t make it for the first ultrasound but I told them we could FaceTime hopefully. I actually slept great last night and Ricky took the day off to get some things done so he let me sleep in and took the kids to school. 🥰 After he got his errands done we went for breakfast. First watch my fav!

The girls at work are all praying for this baby to split so I have been a little anxious about it. I told J what they were up to and she said what if she secretly had been also…. AHHHH you guys are killing me. So my appointment was at 12:30 so we got there way too early because I was excited 😝. We finally got called back and the ultrasound technician was so excited for us that this time it worked. She has done all of my ultrasounds for both of these cycles.

So I get naked waist down and get in the table. They have to do a internal ultrasound because baby is still so tiny. Ricky FaceTimed J and I kept watching the screen trying to see a baby in there. I knew we should also be able to see the heartbeat already also so I wanted to make sure I could see that. I told her at least three times to really look and make sure if it was one or two.

At first I was worried I could see the blob of the baby but I couldn’t see the flickering of the heartbeat. She assured me it was there and she could see it. She zoomed in and then I could too!! 😍 I immediately felt so so much better and calm. Then I was on the hunt making sure I only saw the one little guy. Good news for me it looks like it’s one strong little guy growing in there. I’m so relieved and happy for all of us.

The ultrasound technician said baby looks perfect and is measuring at 6 weeks and 4 days so a little bigger then we’re we are. I should be 6 weeks one day since we know the exact moment he went in 😂. His heart rate is a solid 114 so that’s great too. So much joy and happiness today.

I wish I could better explain to people what this kind of experience is like but honestly unless you have been through it on one side or the other (surrogate or parents) it’s so hard to describe. If I’m honest I feel like I’m even more excited now since we sadly had the failed transfer. I hope the rest of the pregnancy goes smoothly. I am still feeling normal and just enjoying extra naps. I’m thinking my headaches have been more weather related then pregnancy. Now my dreams on the other hand are CRAZY!

I can’t even talk about all these dreams, but they are vivid and weird and way way out there 😂. I swear all night every night I wake up thinking WTF is that about. I know it’s normal for many but this is actually a first for me so it’s kinda cool. I should have another ultrasound in two more weeks and then I believe they should officially release us to my OB! This is exciting for me because I’m sick of all the meds and my butt hurts. I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend as always thanks for all the prayers and support we appreciate all of it.

Beta numbers!

Posted on November 1, 2020 by rashellovesricky

So I slacked off on telling everyone about my actual blood work beta numbers that the dr considers confirmation of pregnancy! I went for the first test on Wednesday morning and by the afternoon we got the numbers back. I was hoping for 200ish it came back at 178 that was 9dpt. 🙌 woohoo that is a good strong number. So then I just had to go back on Friday to get another blood test. They do this to make sure the numbers double. That indicates a successful pregnancy. So at this point we were hoping it doubled.

I went in at 8:30 am so even earlier then I did on Wednesday and all day I waited for the numbers…. Nothing… I kept checking my quest and nothing was there. Finally the Dr office called me and they said they didn’t get them either! Now it was Friday at like 4:30 and they basically said we would have to wait until Monday to find out what the numbers actually were. Turns off it the quest worker didn’t order them as stat! Stat means they are to be done ASAP and faxed to dr. It said it ALL over the lab slip. I was so frustrated with this guy that took my blood now.

Anyway J and I weren’t really worried because my first number was so good it would have just been nice to know the second one. Then on Saturday I took a nap before Halloween trick or treating started and when I woke up J had texted me to let me know the Dr called her because they sent him the numbers!!! It was 478!!! That more then doubled.

So as far as symptoms go I still feel super normal. I just nap even more then normal 😆 if you know me in real life you know my favorite thing to do is nap!!! I just require a lot of sleep. Unless I’m on vacation or it’s Christmas morning. Those are my only exceptions. Oh I do get pretty hungry more often also and still smelling everything from a mile away. I’m just praying I stay lucky and still don’t experience any morning or night sickness. This is pregnancy number 6 and I want to keep this streak going.

My meds are all still the same and going strong. I take estrogen pills 3 times a day and I do my big nighttime butt shot each night plus two pio vaginal suppository’s morning and night also. I will have to do this basically the whole first trimester. Then I will get to wean off them. My butt is sore like normal and sometimes the shot hurts worse then other times. I swear Ricky does this on purpose. 😆 The good news is it’s all totally worth it! I believe I’ll do another blood test on Tuesday so I’ll update them. I hope everyone had a happy Halloween!

My cute kids 🥰

Everyone’s question is have I tested????

Posted on October 27, 2020 by rashellovesricky

So my last post was 4dp 4dt and I was holding strong with not testing. My symptoms were definitely there. Me smelling odd things super strongly. Peeing what felt like too often. Mild cramps from time to time. But that was it nothing else was really happening. I kept checking my boobs to see if they hurt or if my face is breaking out.

Basically an hour or two at most after I made my last blog post I caved and went to check how many tests were actually still in the bag from last time and then I figured well I already got them out what if I just go ahead and take one… ugggg why do I do this to myself. I had like 4 or 5 cheap Walmart ones and only one FRER. (First response early response) So then I’m like well what one do I take? I hate to waste the expensive 8.00 test if it’s too early anyway, But what if the cheap one won’t pick it up but the frer would?

So I ended up deciding if I’m going to do it I’ll just do the cheap one and if I thought maybe something was there I could always still take the frer. So at 2:00 it would be exactly 4dp 5dt. So I figured I would wait until exactly 2:00. So I peed in my cup and used the dropper to take the test. As soon as I was done I instantly felt dread. I left the room and set the timer for 10 mins before I went back to check it. Then I was a little mad at myself for caving. I couldn’t help but worry what if it didn’t work this time too. I mean I basically felt the same except for the smelling stuff and peeing. I just prayed a lot and kept checking on my white chicken chili to pass the time. 😆

When time was up I went to the bathroom to check and I kept telling myself it’s ok if nothing is there because it’s obviously still very early and I’ll be ok either way. When I picked up the test I was literally shocked 😳 like crazy shocked! There was definitely a line. Not like a shadow or check it by tilting it twice under direct sunlight to see haha. This is funny because it’s so true we do this stuff looking for a line or a start of a line. So then I was shaking and couldn’t believe it was actually there and bright. It just kept getting darker the more I looked at it. So obviously for science 🧪 I had to take the other test now just to make sure it would show up too!

I could hear Ricky in the kitchen making himself lunch so I went in and showed him the test too. (Just to make sure) He said great give it here. He could see it too. He was so excited and said he didn’t even have to squint to see this one. I was happy to know I wasn’t crazy. So then I went back to see the frer because that one only takes 3 minutes. You guys I could see it on there too!!! My heart was so so happy. I was so scared my body just wasn’t going to do what the baby needed or something was wrong with me. I know that’s not how it works but I still secretly blamed myself a little.

So then I felt good like so so good. I felt bad for not telling J right away but I was also terrified what if I took another and it wasn’t there like last time. I didn’t want to feel like I let her down again. Ricky insisted I not tell her until I got another test to make sure things were looking good.

Ok so fast forward to Saturday morning this was 5dp a 5dt well at 2:00 it would be. We decided to go walk around down town St Charles Main Street. I wanted to test before we left but didn’t want the test to not look as bright since I didn’t wait very long. So I waited as long as I could and just did it. You guys BAM it was freaking bright. I told Ricky I bet this would show up on a digital test. He said well take one then. So I did. I wasn’t sure if it would work or not. I told him if it showed on a digital then I was definitely calling J because I couldn’t keep this from her any longer. The digital took forever but it finally popped up and to my surprise it said pregnant. 🥰

I FaceTimed J and baby Leaf was there too. I asked him if he wanted to be a big brother and put the test up to the camera. I was so excited and nervous I couldn’t keep my hand still 😂 I was shaking so bad. Obviously we are all so excited but still trying to be cautious. This is exciting but it’s still so early. We decided to ask the clinic today if we could go a day earlier for our blood work and they said yes! So tomorrow I go for our first beta blood draw. Once we get a baseline number I will go back on Friday to get another and see how the numbers double. Thanks everyone for all the support and prayers we for sure appreciate them. I’m so glad I get to share happy news this time.

One last test because well I had one left 😂

4dp 5dt

Posted on October 23, 2020 by rashellovesricky

This means 4 days past a 5 day transfer. I still haven’t tested and it’s so hard but I just can’t go through what I did last time. So I’m waiting. I don’t know how long I’ll wait but for now I’m waiting. Each day is a day closer to my beta blood test.

Yesterday I unpacked all my stuff from my suitcase and cleaned a bit. I also ordered my groceries and watched some crap tv. (90 day Fiancé the other way) 😂 I’m addicted. I still have pregnancy tests left over from my last cycle and I “hid” them from myself in the bathroom closet. Obviously this was dumb because I’m not a toddler and I know they are there… Ricky said I should give them to him and he would hide them but I already know that would be way WAY to risky. I don’t want to test but I like knowing where they are just in case.

I will say Wednesday night between 11 pm and 6 am I got up to pee ***6*** times. I mean I usually get up and pee at night but definitely not 6 times. Then when I was getting the kids ready to leave for school yesterday I swear I smelled dog poo in the dining room. Like the smell was so strong I made everyone look for it before we could leave. We never found any poo… Also I can smell the lemon grass in my oil diffuser still and I haven’t had it on for two days. Ricky says he can’t smell it.

That’s the only things I have really noticed so far. Still a bit of cramping here or there but nothing big. I’m trying to not over analyze everything but I also don’t want to not make mention of things. The hard part is all the meds I’m on make my body think it’s pregnant already so it’s really so hard to know anything. I didn’t pee a ton last night so maybe the peeing was a fluke?

This morning I got to watch my nephew Travis for a few hours so that helped keep me busy and occupied. Then he left and my kids decided to go with my mom also. So now the house is so quiet with Ricky down stairs working. I already made dinner also. It’s only 12:30 😂. I made white chicken chili. I have been seeing it all over Facebook and it looked delicious. I guess I will watch more tv and maybe nap. That always helps pass the time and I love napping.

Puff got a bath and a conditioning treatment last night to keep me busy. She obviously wasn’t amused 😆.

Sweet baby snuggles to keep me pre occupied!

Two days after transfer.

Posted on October 21, 2020 by rashellovesricky

Well not quite. At 2:00 ish it will be 2 days since that’s actually about the time they put the baby in me 😂. I had some mild cramping after and that’s about it. It’s so hard for me because obviously you try to feel every little thing going on in your body hoping it’s a sign of things working and baby growing. I never really get any symptoms of pregnancy anyway. I guess that’s why I enjoy being pregnant so much lol. Once I’m for sure pregnant I do usually break out a bit more then normal and I get tired the first trimester but that’s about it.

Our plane ride home last night was crappy to say the least. They made me check a bag even though I knew it would fit. Plus I had specifically asked the people at the desk where you check bags and the man assured me it would be fine. Then as I’m getting on the plane the woman tells me I have to check it!!! Ugggg I was so frustrated. So by the time we got on there was no more open rows so Ricky and I had to sit with strangers. Plus the lady next to me decided the open middle seat was her’s. Not to mention her bag clearly didn’t fit under her seat.

I know it was dumb to get so frustrated over such dumb things but my hormones are crazy and so therefore I’m crazy too! 😂 I’m glad to be home though in my own bed. I slept so great last night. Our dog and cat missed us a lot. 💓 They slept with us last night.

I’m still terrified to test this time and feel the way I did last time. But I’m also terrified of waiting and pretending it’s all going to be perfect and then getting blindsided by the dr calling. I do still have some tests left over from last time in case I decide I want to test. I think I’m going to just enjoy the unknown for awhile longer this time though.

Thanks as always for all the prayers and encouragement. Hopefully this time everything works out perfectly and I get to share much happier news with everyone.

Transfer is completed ✅

Posted on October 19, 2020 by rashellovesricky

I’m happy to report that the transfer is completed. Everything seemed to go smoothly. So I’m considering myself pregnant at this point 😂. At least until the blood test tells me otherwise.

On my way there I prayed a lot. I always get anxious before transfers. It’s so many emotions you feel and all the estrogen I’m on doesn’t help. We were listening to the radio and a song came on and it seemed pretty fitting. I love that when I’m worried or stressed God can still tell me things are going to be ok.

I got to see the picture of the embryo before they put him in but I couldn’t take a picture or anything. It looked very similar to the last embryo. I could tell it was already hatching. That’s a good thing!

In 10 days I will have my blood beta draw! After the transfer Ricky and I decided to go eat at an Italian restaurant the pasta was SO good! I will still be on all my meds so butt shots, suppository’s and estrogen keep on going.

This was the song we heard right before we went in. 🥰

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