Happy 8 weeks today!

I have a drs appointment at 10:45 but figured I would update now. So far things have been going great. I feel totally normal as usual other then the pregnancy headaches I get from time to time. I haven’t had any this week though so that’s been really nice! On one hand I’m so surprised it’s been so hard and taken us this long to get here. This has definitely been my hardest ivf experience. So so many shots and the emotions can be overwhelming. On the other hand I’m like WOW 8 weeks! I seriously can’t believe I’m 2 months in. It almost makes me sad really. I just love pregnancy so much and everything goes so quickly. Im really trying to enjoy each and every step knowing this is my very last one. 😔 (I know I have said my last one like the last 3 😂) This is baby number 7 though so this should probably be it. Ricky is ready for me to be done. I on the other hand would honestly probably have babies for people until I was 50 if I could! I think there will always be apart of me that is sad knowing I will never be pregnant again. That these are the last baby movements I will get to feel. That this birth will be it. My last. Sad is the only word I have for that. It’s sad.

I also know how blessed I am though that my body has done all of these thing. That God has allowed me to have my two perfect babies and then go on to have 4 more with 5 cooking! 7 babies honestly doesn’t even seem real to me. I am so blessed to have had all these babies. I love my little part in their big lives. I’m so excited for this pregnancy to progress and for all the fun things I know are coming. Her little movements! That’s always my favorite. I want to slow down though and not rush this. I’m sure Karen and Rodger are the opposite they obviously want this time to go quickly so they can have her back. I guess I hope times goes slower for me and super fast for them. 😆 That seems fair!

Like I said I feel great. Some of my pants feel tight at the end of my day but that’s what stretchy leggings are for! I wouldn’t say I’m craving anything really yet. Oh I forgot to say I will get to stop my meds and shots on Oct 28th!!! I do want to rush that part by. Obviously the shots are zero fun and then I feel like I’m a regular pregnant person when I don’t have to stab and inject myself every single day. (Worth it though)

I still hope and pray that baby girl is growing and enjoying her cozy little belly home. It’s amazing to me every single time I read what the baby is doing and how they are growing. Each pregnancy this part excites me. I love seeing and reading all about it on my pregnancy apps. It’s so amazing how fast they grow and all the changes that happen in 9ish short months.

As always thanks everyone for the love and support.

At eight weeks pregnant, Baby Mac is dancing up a storm and won’t be an embryo for much longer!

How’s Baby Mac?

Baby Mac is in their last few days of being an embryo, which means that the brand new, teeny tiny internal organs and systems under their see-through skin are almost all formed, though they’ll continue to develop over the next several months. That tail is also celebrating its last hurrah, and pretty soon it will disappear completely. Baby Mac’s webbed fingers and toes are poking out from their little limbs, which are growing longer every day. And your little one’s facial features are becoming more prominent, as their lips, nose, and eyelids are looking increasingly human-like. Your strawberry-sized bundle of joy is also moving around like crazy, although you almost certainly cannot feel it. Baby Mac’s head, still tiny compared to yours but large in proportion to the rest of their body, now makes up half of their total body weight!

What’s new with you?

Your baby bulge might start protruding at this time, as your appetite increases to match Baby Mac’s. The placenta is also picking up its hormone production, giving yours a break. You’ll likely start to see fewer mood swings soon.

If you’re noticing new growth at your midsection, it may not be a baby bump just yet. At this point it’s probably just water retention. While you might not be showing yet, your uterus has already started growing, and that growth is only going to speed up in the coming weeks!

If you’ve had a good appetite so far in pregnancy, some of that growth at your midsection could also be whatever foods you’ve been noshing on. (If you haven’t experienced any morning sickness yet, there’s a good chance you’re not going to — lucky you!) And if you’ve been experiencing cravings, you’re not alone. Many pregnant folks experience cravings during pregnancy. Cravings are a lot like aversions in that we don’t know exactly what causes them, though it seems likely that it’s got something to do with all the hormones coursing through your body. One theory is that cravings point out nutrients you need more of in your life. Cravings probably also have as much to do with your need for stress relief or your heightened sense of smell as they do with anything else. Keep in mind that cravings are not your enemy — they’re a normal part of pregnancy. So whether you’re craving spicy sweet potatoes or caramel ice cream, an oat milk latte or pan-fried tilapia, if you want to follow through on those cravings, know that it’s okay to do so in moderation. (Though if you’re craving non-food items, like dirt or paint, be sure to speak to your healthcare provider, as you may be experiencing pica, a nutrient deficiency.) Remember that when it comes to your diet, it’s really all about balance.

But if eating is a struggle right now and you’re feeling rather nauseous — and for many folks morning sickness can be rather rough at this time — trying sucking on a ginger lollipop or switching to a chewable prenatal vitamin. You might also consider eating smaller meals while increasing the number of times you eat throughout the day. And if your morning sickness is really bad or you are concerned about dehydration, speak to your provider.

And if you don’t typically engage in physical activity or just haven’t been feeling up to it recently, you may want to see if you can engage in a half hour of light exercise or some gentle movement each day — doing some movement that you feel good about can help you feel much better on all fronts

This was me the other night. My belly was very big so I’m blaming this tiny strawberry girl. 😂

Last ultrasound before transfer!

Ok today was our last ultrasound and blood work before transferring on the 30th! So just 7 days away. I’m happy to report everything looked good lining wise and we are just waiting for my blood work results to come back although I expect them to be fine also. My lining looked to be 14/15 in thickness this week so that’s good they want over a 8 I believe.

We had a great trip in Branson visiting our GG and the kids went back to school yesterday. I’m happy and sad. I love spending summers with the kids but I know they enjoy seeing friends and lord knows they need some structure and less snacks all day! 😂

Karen and I are both feeling excited and anxious. As to be expected I suppose. I still don’t know if I will test this time. My heart and brain are saying no right now at least. I haven’t even bought any tests this time. Usually by now I would have already had a stack ready to go. I’m still hurt by the fact that last time we were pregnant and then suddenly it all just went away. Talk about cruel. We all had the rug ripped from under us. It was just so sad.

I’ve still been doing my acupuncture twice a week and today’s session was my most relaxing yet! I honestly think I fell asleep a bit. I definitely didn’t think I would be able to relax that much knowing I had needles poking out of me. I told Heather my acupuncturist that these were the last two she would see me for and that now all the pressure is on her for our success! Haha She’s so sweet and said she would take all the pressure so I didn’t have it.

Karen already has appointments for me set up when I am in town for the acupuncture the day before and day of transfer. I’m happy to feel like we are doing everything we can to help this little embryo along. We will be transferring another girl this time. I’m praying my body is exactly what she needs and I can provide a soft, fluffy, cozy little home for her until she’s big enough to go live in her home with her mommy and daddy.

Today before I took Everett to school he was asking me if this would be the last baby I would have. I told him I think so as long as the baby sticks in my belly. He said mom you sure have had a lot of babies! I said I know but I really love to be pregnant and have babies. I asked him what he would have thought if I would have wanted that manny babies for our own family and we had to keep them all. He said well I think that’s too many babies for us. Lol he then said if I did have that many to keep he just wanted 4 boys and 4 girls so it could be even. Kids are just so fun.

Well now I’ll just wait for the all clear from Carrie at FCI in chicago. Once she says we are all good I’ll wean off my Lupron this week and I will be doing the big butt shots later this week and all the pills I have to take. Then I’ll fly out Monday and do the transfer on Tuesday. Remember the new motto!

✨TRANSFER THREE IS MEANT TO BE ✨

✨TRANSFER THREE IS MEANT TO BE✨

✨TRANSFER THREE IS MEANT TO BE✨

Ultrasound number 2

Yesterday was ultrasound day. These are the ones we do to check my progress to make sure the meds are doing everything they are supposed to so that my body is perfect for transferring the baby. I’ve been on the Lupron this whole time. These are the little belly shots I do everyday. They put my body into menopause essentially. This way they can make sure I don’t ovulate. I get super annoyed and angry very easily. (Even more than usual) 😆

I am now on estrogen pills too. I take 8 a day 4 in the morning and 4 at night. These thicken my uterine lining. They want me to be nice and fluffy for the little embryo! So yesterday’s appointment was to check and see how my lining was looking. I am at a 12! Woohoo that’s great. They just like you to be over an 8 for transfer so I’m already an overachiever. I have two more weeks before transferring so I will get even thicker. Emotionally I’ve been feeling ok. My estrogen is pretty high with all these extra pills so I can cry over just about anything and that’s definitely not my norm. I’m excited to see Karen, Rodger and the pups in a couple weeks. I’m excited and anxious about this transfer. I know it will feel that much sweeter once we actually get pregnant though.

Here at home Kailynn is starting middle school this year and she’s so nervous and excited. She goes on Monday. I always hate how fast summers seem to go by. I love our pool days and getting to sleep in and stay up late. Everett is all ready for 4th grade. We sent Bo off to puppy boot camp (training) he will be back in about a week and a half and I’m so excited. I have missed my big fluffy puppy. Hopefully he will be better mannered and excited to come home. I’ll get to see him for about 2 days before I fly out to chicago.

Currently I am in a hotel in Branson mo. We are visiting our GG! We are just spending as much time with her as she wants us too. We have been doing some chores to help her around the house. I think we will try to get some fun in too. The kids love doing miniature golf here and honestly so do I! My next ultrasound is next Tuesday so I’ll update after that one also. As long as that one looks good they will clear me to come the next week for the transfer. My new motto is transfer three is meant to be! ❤️🤞❤️

Branson car ride
Coffee outside of the hotel
Puppy boot camp with a crazy friend 🥰
What a handsome guy 😍
So much estrogen! 😆

First ultrasound today.

I’ve been on the Lupron but today was our first ultrasound and blood work. I got up got there. I was just expecting my usual when all the sudden she says oh well looks like you have a fibroid! I was shocked and didn’t know what to think. I immediately said well I bet this cycle is canceled. I have never had a fibroid as far as I know but I figured no way it was a good thing. My ultra sonographer was so sweet and did her best to talk me off my ledge. She explained that they are very common and that it was actually super tiny and not at all in the way of my lining. It was nice but I definitely was still upset. I even told her I probably wouldn’t see her next week. 😔

As soon as I got to the car I called Karen. I explained what they say and that the ultra sonographer was not worried but I really was. I was super upset because they made me be put under for the HSC procedure to check for any polyps scar tissue etc. this was literally 30 days ago and they said everything was all good and clear. How the heck does this just happen? I was honestly heart broken. I just felt like my body was giving up on us. I called Ricky and he was nice and too calm about it all. I just wanted someone else to also feel horrible about the news and to be sad and angry with me but he wasn’t. He told me there was only room for one of us to be all worried and worked up. That’s true and I’m glad he didn’t also freak out with me. It really wouldn’t have done me any good.

I went straight to acupuncture and was in tears. Going twice a week I feel like we are all besties there now. 😂 The girls were so kind and I explained what the ultrasound showed and Heather just listened and put in my needles. I closed my eyes and just rested and prayed. I prayed it would go away and that it wouldn’t be an issue for baby being able to implant. I prayed that we wouldn’t have to cancel it all and do more tests and procedures. I actually really did get to relax while I was there. I did feel more calm and at peace while I was laying there. I needed that because I was obnoxiously stressed and anxious at this point.

Once I was done I went to the car to come home and I decided to just call FCI and ask to talk to a nurse. Thankfully I was able to get through quickly and tell her what happened and ask her opinion. I knew she didn’t have the official report yet but I told her I just couldn’t wait all day waiting to hear if it was likely going to be bad news. So I told her everything I was told and waited for her to tell me what I just knew was the bad news coming our way. 😔

Much to my surprise she wasn’t surprised or shocked in the least. She said it was super common and that if didn’t sound like I should be worried at all. She said obviously she needed to see the report and have the DR go over it but that she didn’t expect it to be anything to worry about especially since we just did the HSC test. This was very reassuring for the time being. I called Karen and cried a bit because I was so relieved that my body was still ok and working hard for us.

I real take this so so seriously! It’s not lost on me how much trust these families have put into me. I just need to learn to not put so much pressure on myself. I know I can only do so much it’s just hard to remind myself of that. I had to wait a few more hours to wait for the other nurse to call me and really confirm all was ok. I let the doubts and anxiety slip back in. I always go to the worst case scenarios.

When she called I was of course with a client at work but she was so kind and let me answer. Thankfully they re confirmed all was still a go and that it was super super tiny and not of concern. I could have cried again. So in a few days now I will be adding in the estrogen to start bulking up and building my lining to a super thick and cozy home the new little embryo! I’m praying so hard that this little one is actually the one. The third times the charm!!!

I’m hoping at next week’s appointment my fibroid has just disappeared or that it at least stays small and doesn’t get in the way of anything. Thanks as usual to everyone for the thoughts and prayers during all this. It’s such a crazy roller coaster of emotions. I’ll update next week after our next appointment.

3 day past 6 day transfer

I’m officially 3 days past the transfer at like 10 am today. I’m still in Chicago. I stayed in bed for two solid days. Day of transfer and the day after. Yesterday I ventured out and walked around. The weather was gorgeous low 70’s. I had some cramping the first day and a half I would say. Now nothing. It’s so hard knowing they put the embryo in and now you have to wait and over analyze every little thing. I have hours where I’m so at peace and confident that this time it’s the time. I feel like we had such a great transfer day. The embryo looked SO SO great and my lining was even thicker then last time. Plus the music gave me such comfort. It all seemed so meant to be. But then I also have too much time on my hands because I’m here alone 😂. That’s when my brain starts saying STOP you can’t be too excited Rashel. Sometimes it just doesn’t work. Then I spiral into what if it fails again. What if I take test after test and they are all white again. I will once again have to feel all the emotions while on all these crazy medications. Then I pick myself back up and say no stay positive. I know I have done everything perfectly. Taken all the meds and all the appointments looked great. My body has done everything it’s supposed to so that this little girl should want to stay. It’s now up to her, God and science!

I did finish my book and have watched some tv. Today is my last day in Chicago I go home tomorrow morning. Today is a BIG day for Karen she has been working hard for this fundraising event to help the boys and girls club. They will all get to wear gorgeous gowns and drink and dance the night away. Hopefully they raise lots of money from the auction to help the club. I get to go do hair for everyone tonight before they go out! I’m excited for that.

We decided to take our test tomorrow morning before I leave for the airport. I didn’t want to test today and her be sad or disappointed for the event she worked so hard for. Plus hopefully tomorrow we can have a stronger line on the test anyway. I keep visualizing there being two lines. We want it so bad. I know even if a line doesn’t show up tomorrow we would have time for it to show up but it sure would be nice to see it earlier. I really want Karen to have such great news.

Karen also gave me one of the best gifts ever while I was here. She is seriously too kind and a wonderful gift giver. She gave me a copy of a special poem that has significant meaning to her and Rodger. They always tell each other they have each other’s hearts and carry them. So then she gave me a heart necklace to Symbolize that I get to carry their baby’s heart! You guys 😭😭😭😭 it was so so beautiful. The meaning behind it is so incredibly beautiful. I am so lucky to be trusted with peoples most precious of things. Their babies! That will never be lost on me. I just keep praying so hard that this little girl is strong! That she can find a perfect cozy spot inside of me so that she can live and grow! So I can hold and protect her tiny heart until she’s big enough and ready to go to her mommy and daddy! I will keep this necklace on forever. ❤️🥰❤️

For a funny story yesterday Ricky told me that the cardinals were actually here in Chicago playing! I had no idea. So I was with Molly and I teased him that Molly just said I could go with them! (They always get season tickets and he knows it) I will upload the screen shots from our text. Let’s just say Ricky wasn’t happy that he didn’t get to go. 😂 But then when I got back to the room I had a delivery! It was an edible arrangement. Now I felt extra bad for the trick because I still hadn’t told him I wasn’t actually going to the game. Turns out he went to his physical therapy appointment and told everyone there how excited he was for me that I was going to a cards cubs game at Wrigley Field. 😆

So I will update everyone tomorrow at some point about our first test. Please PLEASE be praying and sending all your good thoughts and emotions our way. We need them. here are the fun pictures so far.

First messages!
Second message and then he FaceTimed us! 😂
I just happened to have packed one cards shirt so I put it on to show him I was going! 😂
My delicious delivery
❤️😘❤️
The poem. ❤️😭❤️
It’s so so pretty
It’s perfect!!!

My last 2 appointments

Well I didn’t update after my last one. 😂 Sorry guys. My last appointment was last Wednesday my lining thickness was 14! Again I only need to be at a 10 anymore is just a bonus. So today when I went in I was at about 18 she said. This is even thicker then last transfer so I’m hoping this will be extra helpful for baby girl to snuggle in deep.

This week we went to the zoo and we had a great time with the kids. I tried to convince Ricky to take me and the kids to Disney this weekend before my transfer but he said no and when I looked up the parks we couldn’t even get in to the ones I wanted to go to. 😂 So I guess my idea won’t happen. Our Puppy Bo Bear is getting super big and still learning and eating all the things he shouldn’t. Like leaves, sticks, mulch and paper. Good news he’s so cute we love him anyway.

Im excited for my blood work to come back and see what my estrogen is at because I know it’s super HIGH. I can cry just thinking about crying. 😭 😂 I have cried watching silly tv shows and I almost cried at the zoo yesterday. I don’t even remember why that’s how emotional I am right now. The silliest things just put me over the edge.

I’ll wait for FCI (the fertility clinic) to call me today with their update and then on Monday I will be flying out to Chicago. Karen and I are so excited to try again I have everything crossed and so many prayers that this time it will work. I need to see a positive pregnancy test this time! If I’m looking for up sides I’ll get to go back to Chicago and see my friends and enjoy a nice hotel stay without the kids and Ricky. I will get to sleep in and order food or go shopping 🛍 on Michigan Avenue! I’m sure I will come up with plenty to do. I can also finish reading my book I started.

I’ll update everyone on transfer day. Keep the prayers and good thoughts coming our way!

This was last weeks at 14 for thickness
Blood work from last week
Today’s lining at 18ish 😍
My sweet message from Ricky before my appointment today
Look how big this dog is getting!

Today we start again.

Today is the day I start meds again. I will be starting the Lupron shots again tonight. This is the drug that puts my body into menopause. So I get super rage and all the other stuff. Like night sweats, insomnia and other fun stuff. Karen said I can call her and rage whenever I need too. 😆

I will go for lining check and blood work for the next 3 weeks and then I will fly out on the 30th for our transfer on the 31st! So just 29 days until transfer. I’m really hoping and praying this little girl sticks this time. I’m going to make sure to tell Dr Kaplan to push her in a little deeper this time. 😂 I will stay a few days after like last time and we will test together again before I leave.

It really REALLY sucked last time testing together and not getting a positive but I also know just how incredible and exciting it will be if we test together and we do get a positive so that’s what I’m really hoping happens this time. Ricky won’t be able to go with me this time. I have mixed emotions about it. 😂 Down side he won’t be there to spend time with when I’m bored… He also will not be able to give me my shots. Karen said she’s going to be brave and do them! I know she will do fine. The perks of Ricky not going are I get to be in a hotel room alone! I can watch what I pick, eat when I want and nap and shop when I want! No husband to say I don’t think you need that do you… 😆 I mean does anyone really NEED anything?

My Birthday is 6/8 and I’m telling everyone all I want for my birthday this year is to get pregnant with Karen and Rodgers baby! Plus any other gifts people decide they must get me. Im a size 12 days at the beach kinnda girl. 😆 So hopefully God willing this transfer will work just fine and then on 6/10 will be our first blood test to check for beta numbers. They typically like to see around 100 or more. I’ve always had a big mix of numbers. Ellie was my lowest at like 70 something and then I have had some pretty high ones where I was like oh crap what if this little one split into twins! I won’t lie that’s always my big fear.

Twins would be exciting and I would do my very best but I would just worry selfishly about me not being able to work as much and honestly just keeping two babies healthy in there. I know I’m a pro with one! I’ll post a picture of my med calendar so you all can see how crazy and in depth this stuff is. I read it each morning and each night just to make sure I am doing everything properly. I don’t want to mess anything up.

As always thanks for the continued thoughts and prayers for the baby, parents and me! Don’t forget to pray for Ricky and my kids who have a bit of a crazy rage mom for a few weeks. 😂

Say it with me: This time is the right time, this time baby girl is going to dig in deep and my body is ready to help her grow. 🥰

Beta day

Well beta day is usually filled with excitement trying to think of how high your first beta numbers may be. They like to see over 100. Obviously with all my negative tests I wasn’t expecting a good outcome. I won’t lie though I was still secretly hoping for a miracle.

I got the results about 2ish they called and I already knew because I had checked my quest email a few minutes before. It was definitely negative. I know I/we gave this baby girl all we could and for some reason God must have had another plan. It 100% still sucks and I hate it. This part never seems fair. I mean we did EVERYTHING we were supposed to do. All my meds all my appointments looked good. My lining was triple striped. The embryos are all genetically tested and graded. All they can say is sorry and sometimes it still doesn’t work. 😔

I take comfort in knowing that I did my very best to give her a loving, thick, warm little uterus to try her very best to snuggle into. I feel grateful knowing that I am trusted by Karen and Rodger to hold their baby until she or he is ready for this great big world. What a honor and privilege it is for these families to trust me with literally the most precious cargo. ❤️

If I’m trying to find a bright side then these are the things.

1. I stop meds today so no more butt shots! I now get a break for a bit.

2. I’m going to have a drink tonight! I deserve it! 😂

3. I get to go back to Chicago and visit my friends again. I’ll bring them more salsa too!

So now the plan is to stop meds wait for a terrible period and start birth control again. Then I will go right back into Lupron and eventually progesterone in oil again before transfer (butt shots). Then transfer another sweet embryo into my uterus again. I’m sad but also happy to have a plan moving forward. Here is to a hopeful may transfer!

Sorry I also hate when I post the negative sad stuff but it’s real and sadly part of the process.

The new puppy gave me lots of love.
We got our kit kit a sweater and she’s not a fan. 😂

7 days past transfer

Well I’ve still been trying to get something to pop up on the pregnancy tests and I’ve had little glimpses of something trying to come through. Yesterdays test looked promising so I figured today’s would look good in the morning. Sadly it didn’t. I don’t feel like I see anything at all. It all sucks. I know this is part of the process and it can happen but it doesn’t make it suck any less.

Thursday is the official blood draw day so I’m not going to take any more tests until blood work comes back. I’m at the place now I think it’s mentally best to prepare for a fail and hope to be surprised by blood work. This sucks for us all. We all put so much work into this for it to not work. I know we did everything we could though. I’m going to suck it up and power through the week.

I will update everyone on Thursday after I get the official confirmation either way. Thanks as always for all the thoughts and prayers say a couple extra for Karen I know how much she wants this. ❤️

Pregnancy test day! 😬

Happy April 1st. Today is the day Karen and I have been waiting on where she will come over and we will take a home pregnancy test together. We have both been anxious the last day and a half at least. We had wonderful massages and pedicures yesterday so that helped take our minds off it a bit. It’s 6:00 am and we are not testing until 11:30 ish. I will officially be 4dp 6dt! I am excited and terrified all at the same time. On one hand I feel like a line is for sure going to pop right up. I feel it. I feel so tired and I definitely had the cramping and I felt like I could really smell stuff too! Yesterday after my nap I felt so nauseous for like an hour or more. The problem is I obviously over analyze everything because I know they put a baby in there! The pio butt injections are also supposed to literally make my body think it’s pregnant so it really could all be tied to that as well.

It’s honestly hard to distinguish how real it is. They just have me on so many drugs. I keep telling myself even if there is not a line it’s totally ok and we have plenty of time. While I know that’s technically true it will also still be crushing to not have a second line today. I’ve never tested in person with anyone before. It’s one thing to call and tell someone you don’t see anything yet. It’s a whole new thing to have her go look and SEE her disappointment. Thats my biggest fear right now. But the other side of that coin is I could be seeing joy, excitement, happy tears and pure happiness. That’s obviously the outcome I really really want to happen.

I have had a couple people ask if I would cheat and test before we test together and I won’t/wouldn’t. I want this to be real and authentic no matter what today’s outcome may be. That’s not to say I haven’t been tempted believe me I have! Yesterday in my transfer group two other girls who transferred the same day as me all got very faint positive tests. I am so excited for them and hopefully things continue in the right direction and the lines just keep getting brighter. I even asked Karen yesterday if she wanted to just try testing yesterday after our appointment and she’s obviously way stronger then me because I was ready to cave and go for it. She said no let’s just go ahead and wait until tomorrow! I’m positive that was the better choice 😂.

So now I just keep waiting until 11:30 rolls around and we get to take a test. I just wanted to get my real thoughts and emotions out here before it was actually test time. I will update with the good or not good news later. (Hopefully hopefully good) I will also add a picture of my test I took last time when it was positive at 4 days past transfer! This looks me I feel like was super bright and it was with baby Oliver. I hope this baby Girl is digging in deep and throwing out tons of hcg as well.

This was Oliver’s test!
Oliver’s test 4 days past transfer
The room service breakfast here is so so good.

Ok it’s now 11:13 and Karen is on her way. I’m seriously sooooo anxious 😬 it’s terrible terrible. I don’t know why we thought this was a good idea. 😂 Oh please please let this turn out ok.

Ok it’s now 5:23 so way later sorry guys. Karen got here and I peed. I brought the cup out so we could do them together and walk away.

We waited the 3 mins like the first response test said and I told Karen to go look. She did and sadly she said she didn’t see anything. I also went to look and I also didn’t see any lines or shadows. 😞 I obviously felt terrible and kept saying sorry. Karen took it well. Well as well as anyone could. We were just so hopeful obviously. We also both know 4dpt is super early still. I wanted to just cancel lunch and tell her to go without me. But we packed up and went to meet her friend Genevieve. I honestly had the best time!!! It was exactly what I needed I just wanted to crawl back in bed, cry and sleep. I’m so happy I didn’t. We laughed and talked for hours. She was so much fun and definitely my kind of person to hang out with. Obviously Karen only has the best friends! Everyone she knows is just incredible. ❤️ They both had drinks and I had some decaf coffees and lemon water. The food was great we went to RH and it’s just a beautiful spot. We also saw a couple get engaged!!! How adorable is that. Anyway Karen dropped me back off at the hotel and Ricky said he got me a surprise. He got me a chocolate cake to make me feel better.

How sweet is he.

He then saw me pick up the test again and I swore I could see a line now… He also said he saw it earlier but didn’t want to say anything to me. 😂 He knows I’m a psycho.

So I obviously immediately called Karen and was like wait now we see something! I did my best to take pictures and show her. It’s definitely outside the window of accurate test results so it could be a false positive perhaps but I’m going to hope and pray it’s not and that as the days go on the line gets darker and brighter. Regardless I go on the 7th for the official blood work. The good news is they have more embryos also and I know we can try again. I don’t want to have to but we can. 🥰 I’ll post the pictures of the dried test so you all can see also. Let’s all pray and cross all our fingers and toes for us to get brighter stronger lines in the official time frame so we can feel great about all this. We are going out to dinner tonight and we fly home tomorrow morning.