Last ultrasound before transfer!

Ok today was our last ultrasound and blood work before transferring on the 30th! So just 7 days away. I’m happy to report everything looked good lining wise and we are just waiting for my blood work results to come back although I expect them to be fine also. My lining looked to be 14/15 in thickness this week so that’s good they want over a 8 I believe.

We had a great trip in Branson visiting our GG and the kids went back to school yesterday. I’m happy and sad. I love spending summers with the kids but I know they enjoy seeing friends and lord knows they need some structure and less snacks all day! 😂

Karen and I are both feeling excited and anxious. As to be expected I suppose. I still don’t know if I will test this time. My heart and brain are saying no right now at least. I haven’t even bought any tests this time. Usually by now I would have already had a stack ready to go. I’m still hurt by the fact that last time we were pregnant and then suddenly it all just went away. Talk about cruel. We all had the rug ripped from under us. It was just so sad.

I’ve still been doing my acupuncture twice a week and today’s session was my most relaxing yet! I honestly think I fell asleep a bit. I definitely didn’t think I would be able to relax that much knowing I had needles poking out of me. I told Heather my acupuncturist that these were the last two she would see me for and that now all the pressure is on her for our success! Haha She’s so sweet and said she would take all the pressure so I didn’t have it.

Karen already has appointments for me set up when I am in town for the acupuncture the day before and day of transfer. I’m happy to feel like we are doing everything we can to help this little embryo along. We will be transferring another girl this time. I’m praying my body is exactly what she needs and I can provide a soft, fluffy, cozy little home for her until she’s big enough to go live in her home with her mommy and daddy.

Today before I took Everett to school he was asking me if this would be the last baby I would have. I told him I think so as long as the baby sticks in my belly. He said mom you sure have had a lot of babies! I said I know but I really love to be pregnant and have babies. I asked him what he would have thought if I would have wanted that manny babies for our own family and we had to keep them all. He said well I think that’s too many babies for us. Lol he then said if I did have that many to keep he just wanted 4 boys and 4 girls so it could be even. Kids are just so fun.

Well now I’ll just wait for the all clear from Carrie at FCI in chicago. Once she says we are all good I’ll wean off my Lupron this week and I will be doing the big butt shots later this week and all the pills I have to take. Then I’ll fly out Monday and do the transfer on Tuesday. Remember the new motto!

✨TRANSFER THREE IS MEANT TO BE ✨

✨TRANSFER THREE IS MEANT TO BE✨

✨TRANSFER THREE IS MEANT TO BE✨

3 day past 6 day transfer

I’m officially 3 days past the transfer at like 10 am today. I’m still in Chicago. I stayed in bed for two solid days. Day of transfer and the day after. Yesterday I ventured out and walked around. The weather was gorgeous low 70’s. I had some cramping the first day and a half I would say. Now nothing. It’s so hard knowing they put the embryo in and now you have to wait and over analyze every little thing. I have hours where I’m so at peace and confident that this time it’s the time. I feel like we had such a great transfer day. The embryo looked SO SO great and my lining was even thicker then last time. Plus the music gave me such comfort. It all seemed so meant to be. But then I also have too much time on my hands because I’m here alone 😂. That’s when my brain starts saying STOP you can’t be too excited Rashel. Sometimes it just doesn’t work. Then I spiral into what if it fails again. What if I take test after test and they are all white again. I will once again have to feel all the emotions while on all these crazy medications. Then I pick myself back up and say no stay positive. I know I have done everything perfectly. Taken all the meds and all the appointments looked great. My body has done everything it’s supposed to so that this little girl should want to stay. It’s now up to her, God and science!

I did finish my book and have watched some tv. Today is my last day in Chicago I go home tomorrow morning. Today is a BIG day for Karen she has been working hard for this fundraising event to help the boys and girls club. They will all get to wear gorgeous gowns and drink and dance the night away. Hopefully they raise lots of money from the auction to help the club. I get to go do hair for everyone tonight before they go out! I’m excited for that.

We decided to take our test tomorrow morning before I leave for the airport. I didn’t want to test today and her be sad or disappointed for the event she worked so hard for. Plus hopefully tomorrow we can have a stronger line on the test anyway. I keep visualizing there being two lines. We want it so bad. I know even if a line doesn’t show up tomorrow we would have time for it to show up but it sure would be nice to see it earlier. I really want Karen to have such great news.

Karen also gave me one of the best gifts ever while I was here. She is seriously too kind and a wonderful gift giver. She gave me a copy of a special poem that has significant meaning to her and Rodger. They always tell each other they have each other’s hearts and carry them. So then she gave me a heart necklace to Symbolize that I get to carry their baby’s heart! You guys 😭😭😭😭 it was so so beautiful. The meaning behind it is so incredibly beautiful. I am so lucky to be trusted with peoples most precious of things. Their babies! That will never be lost on me. I just keep praying so hard that this little girl is strong! That she can find a perfect cozy spot inside of me so that she can live and grow! So I can hold and protect her tiny heart until she’s big enough and ready to go to her mommy and daddy! I will keep this necklace on forever. ❤️🥰❤️

For a funny story yesterday Ricky told me that the cardinals were actually here in Chicago playing! I had no idea. So I was with Molly and I teased him that Molly just said I could go with them! (They always get season tickets and he knows it) I will upload the screen shots from our text. Let’s just say Ricky wasn’t happy that he didn’t get to go. 😂 But then when I got back to the room I had a delivery! It was an edible arrangement. Now I felt extra bad for the trick because I still hadn’t told him I wasn’t actually going to the game. Turns out he went to his physical therapy appointment and told everyone there how excited he was for me that I was going to a cards cubs game at Wrigley Field. 😆

So I will update everyone tomorrow at some point about our first test. Please PLEASE be praying and sending all your good thoughts and emotions our way. We need them. here are the fun pictures so far.

First messages!
Second message and then he FaceTimed us! 😂
I just happened to have packed one cards shirt so I put it on to show him I was going! 😂
My delicious delivery
❤️😘❤️
The poem. ❤️😭❤️
It’s so so pretty
It’s perfect!!!

My last 2 appointments

Well I didn’t update after my last one. 😂 Sorry guys. My last appointment was last Wednesday my lining thickness was 14! Again I only need to be at a 10 anymore is just a bonus. So today when I went in I was at about 18 she said. This is even thicker then last transfer so I’m hoping this will be extra helpful for baby girl to snuggle in deep.

This week we went to the zoo and we had a great time with the kids. I tried to convince Ricky to take me and the kids to Disney this weekend before my transfer but he said no and when I looked up the parks we couldn’t even get in to the ones I wanted to go to. 😂 So I guess my idea won’t happen. Our Puppy Bo Bear is getting super big and still learning and eating all the things he shouldn’t. Like leaves, sticks, mulch and paper. Good news he’s so cute we love him anyway.

Im excited for my blood work to come back and see what my estrogen is at because I know it’s super HIGH. I can cry just thinking about crying. 😭 😂 I have cried watching silly tv shows and I almost cried at the zoo yesterday. I don’t even remember why that’s how emotional I am right now. The silliest things just put me over the edge.

I’ll wait for FCI (the fertility clinic) to call me today with their update and then on Monday I will be flying out to Chicago. Karen and I are so excited to try again I have everything crossed and so many prayers that this time it will work. I need to see a positive pregnancy test this time! If I’m looking for up sides I’ll get to go back to Chicago and see my friends and enjoy a nice hotel stay without the kids and Ricky. I will get to sleep in and order food or go shopping 🛍 on Michigan Avenue! I’m sure I will come up with plenty to do. I can also finish reading my book I started.

I’ll update everyone on transfer day. Keep the prayers and good thoughts coming our way!

This was last weeks at 14 for thickness
Blood work from last week
Today’s lining at 18ish 😍
My sweet message from Ricky before my appointment today
Look how big this dog is getting!

Today we start again.

Today is the day I start meds again. I will be starting the Lupron shots again tonight. This is the drug that puts my body into menopause. So I get super rage and all the other stuff. Like night sweats, insomnia and other fun stuff. Karen said I can call her and rage whenever I need too. 😆

I will go for lining check and blood work for the next 3 weeks and then I will fly out on the 30th for our transfer on the 31st! So just 29 days until transfer. I’m really hoping and praying this little girl sticks this time. I’m going to make sure to tell Dr Kaplan to push her in a little deeper this time. 😂 I will stay a few days after like last time and we will test together again before I leave.

It really REALLY sucked last time testing together and not getting a positive but I also know just how incredible and exciting it will be if we test together and we do get a positive so that’s what I’m really hoping happens this time. Ricky won’t be able to go with me this time. I have mixed emotions about it. 😂 Down side he won’t be there to spend time with when I’m bored… He also will not be able to give me my shots. Karen said she’s going to be brave and do them! I know she will do fine. The perks of Ricky not going are I get to be in a hotel room alone! I can watch what I pick, eat when I want and nap and shop when I want! No husband to say I don’t think you need that do you… 😆 I mean does anyone really NEED anything?

My Birthday is 6/8 and I’m telling everyone all I want for my birthday this year is to get pregnant with Karen and Rodgers baby! Plus any other gifts people decide they must get me. Im a size 12 days at the beach kinnda girl. 😆 So hopefully God willing this transfer will work just fine and then on 6/10 will be our first blood test to check for beta numbers. They typically like to see around 100 or more. I’ve always had a big mix of numbers. Ellie was my lowest at like 70 something and then I have had some pretty high ones where I was like oh crap what if this little one split into twins! I won’t lie that’s always my big fear.

Twins would be exciting and I would do my very best but I would just worry selfishly about me not being able to work as much and honestly just keeping two babies healthy in there. I know I’m a pro with one! I’ll post a picture of my med calendar so you all can see how crazy and in depth this stuff is. I read it each morning and each night just to make sure I am doing everything properly. I don’t want to mess anything up.

As always thanks for the continued thoughts and prayers for the baby, parents and me! Don’t forget to pray for Ricky and my kids who have a bit of a crazy rage mom for a few weeks. 😂

Say it with me: This time is the right time, this time baby girl is going to dig in deep and my body is ready to help her grow. 🥰

10 days until transfer!

Well I have been on my ivf drugs. Things are going well. I’m hormonal and crazy as expected with all the estrogen and progesterone. I’m definitely getting excited now. Today is our last ultrasound appointment to check lining and blood work. In the mean time we got a puppy last week and boy are we tired. He’s so sweet but man I forgot how hard puppies are. All the potty training and crying at night. Basically I have a newborn at home. 😂

Today when I got to my appointment they told me they didn’t have someone to do the ultrasound!!! Mind you I had this scheduled for OVER a month now. To say I was frustrated would be an understatement. I let them know it had to be done today so after some waiting they filled out a new order and sent me on my way to the hospital. I went straight there and the hospital staff was so kind and helpful once I explained how important it was to be done today! They called and were able to squeeze me in so I go back at 3pm today.

I called FCI and they were so nice and said for me to just make sure I ask what my lining thickness is today and let them know. On Tuesday it was 10mm so I know that’s already good. they need a minimum of 8 to do transfer so since I’m over that we are good. I will start the big butt shots next week. Eeek my poor butt is already dreading this. 😂

So I will fly out next Sunday morning and transfer will be Monday!!! We also got exciting news that Karen gets to come to the transfer with me now. That makes us both happy. It’s a really cool experience to see the baby/embryo go in so I’m happy she gets to see it now also. ❤️❤️❤️

I will be in Chicago for a bit after transfer for couch rest. Sign me up for this. 😂 I love napping and resting. I know Karen is planning some fun things for us while I’m in town and I’m excited to meet more of her friends. Plus I’ll get to spend some time with Molly and Jon and the girls. Im hoping the weather stays nice and I can do some fun shopping as well! I’ve been eyeing some cute new summer tote bags… 🤫 Dont tell Ricky! 😂

After my final appointment yesterday my blood work was all good and my lining was 12.2 so I’m perfectly fluffy and I’m praying baby digs in deep and I have a perfect little home for 9 plus months.

Two days after transfer.

Well not quite. At 2:00 ish it will be 2 days since that’s actually about the time they put the baby in me 😂. I had some mild cramping after and that’s about it. It’s so hard for me because obviously you try to feel every little thing going on in your body hoping it’s a sign of things working and baby growing. I never really get any symptoms of pregnancy anyway. I guess that’s why I enjoy being pregnant so much lol. Once I’m for sure pregnant I do usually break out a bit more then normal and I get tired the first trimester but that’s about it.

Our plane ride home last night was crappy to say the least. They made me check a bag even though I knew it would fit. Plus I had specifically asked the people at the desk where you check bags and the man assured me it would be fine. Then as I’m getting on the plane the woman tells me I have to check it!!! Ugggg I was so frustrated. So by the time we got on there was no more open rows so Ricky and I had to sit with strangers. Plus the lady next to me decided the open middle seat was her’s. Not to mention her bag clearly didn’t fit under her seat.

I know it was dumb to get so frustrated over such dumb things but my hormones are crazy and so therefore I’m crazy too! 😂 I’m glad to be home though in my own bed. I slept so great last night. Our dog and cat missed us a lot. 💓 They slept with us last night.

I’m still terrified to test this time and feel the way I did last time. But I’m also terrified of waiting and pretending it’s all going to be perfect and then getting blindsided by the dr calling. I do still have some tests left over from last time in case I decide I want to test. I think I’m going to just enjoy the unknown for awhile longer this time though.

Thanks as always for all the prayers and encouragement. Hopefully this time everything works out perfectly and I get to share much happier news with everyone.

This lady and all her stuff… 🙄
Then she shoved it even closer to me.

Transfer is completed

So I actually slept well last night. I didn’t get to anxious or nervous until it was drive time! I prayed the whole way to the office. I’m not sure everyone understands how much pressure I/surrogates put on ourselves. I cried in the office praying for this sweet baby.

We all already love her so much! That’s right it’s a GIRL!!! I prayed for the doctors and nurses and the embryo technician! I prayed that my lining and body was just what this little lady needed to feel comfortable for the next 9 plus months. It’s such an exciting and nerve racking time. So many shots and emotions go into preparing for this very moment. Then it’s over in less then 10 mins. Now it’s up to this baby and my body and all our prayers. It’s difficult for me to not be emotional during all this.

I know this baby is so loved by so many already! My job for the next week or two is to try my best to be stress free and just keep taking my meds and shots. We have official blood work on the 31st to check my HCG that’s the pregnancy hormones. I’m hoping to hold off on my at home tests until Sunday or Monday. It will be super hard but it’s also super hard to see negative tests. If I do test on Sunday it’s likely to still be negative. But we can all hope and pray 😂. I went back to the store to try to find more pregnancy test that I like and they were still sold out from when I bought the last 8! Lol.

I’ll try to make another post in the next day or two to update if I have any symptoms to note. Although the pio drug I’m on makes my body think it’s pregnant so it’s hard to go off that too much. After the transfer we went and had a nice lunch and just enjoyed being together! I was excited to tell the waiter that I couldn’t have a Bloody Mary because I just got pregnant today! 😂 I’m not sure he was as amused as we all were. So now we need all the love and prayers we can get. I want to see this little girls face in 9ish months!!! I just know she will be perfect and beautiful!!!

I’m so incredibly blessed to be able to help others. I truly hope this helps show others and my own kids that we can all do something to help others! This world can be a beautiful place if we all love and help each other. I so often have people tell me how great I am etc. I truly want everyone to know how blessed I have been to be able to do this. Yes I know I’m giving a gift and helping a family but you have no idea how much these families mean to me!!! These are friends that I would have never met or known had I not decided to do something like this. I can’t imagine not having these people in our lives.

Obviously I know this is not something everyone can do or wants to do and that’s ok! I know I’m crazy and love being pregnant but that’s why this is such a perfect thing for me to do. Here are some fun pictures from our last few days. ❤️ check out these leggings. 😂

Check out these adorable leggings I found for us to wear! They are storks!!!
I wore my bracelet from last time too!
So funny that they even made something like these!
Baby Girl!!! Isn’t she already perfect 💗