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25 weeks and 4 days!

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We are still moving right along with not much big news. I like it that way! I can definitely tell I’m hitting the 3rd trimester my back and hips are hurting a bit more and I feel like my belly is getting pretty big now. 😆 Everyone says I’m tiny but I feel large and in charge! Taking a bath definitely helps with the uncomfortableness in my back and hips. I just wish they made bathtubs for regular size people. If I’m in there either my boobs and belly stick out or I’m trying to roll side to side to stay warm. I need a deep bath I can actually lay in. Plus I know I’m short and my legs barely fit I can’t imagine all the regular or tall people out there trying to get in. 😂

Home life has been good but busy. Bo got his staples out from his emergency surgery so that’s a huge relief. In the mean time our ceilings have been needed to be repaired. The popcorn ceiling was not repaired correctly and we just decided it would be better to have them ALL removed. Oh my is my house a mess. Dust and yuck everywhere. Not to mention these guys come to work on it at 7am! We all know I need my beauty rest. I’m hoping they will be all done by the end of this week. I’m sure it will be worth it once it’s done.

So much white dust!

In the meantime I’m soaking up all the baby wiggles and kicks I can get from this precious little girl. She’s so much fun and I’m loving every second of our time together! I know realistically we don’t have much more time and that makes me a little sad but so very happy for her mommy and daddy. I know they can’t wait to get their hands on her. She’s been so wanted and so loved for so long. She sure is going to be a lucky little girl with all the love and attention she’s about to be getting. I picked out a dress for the baby shower I think I like but I will keep my eyes open for anything else just in case. I’m excited to get away and go spend time with Molly and the family and of course Karen too in a few weeks. I have been feeling a little stir crazy lately with this winter weather. I miss sunshine and warmth. I want to go for walks outside and do fun things with family and friends. Winter is just not for me. I feel lonely and cold! I’ve not been exercising as much as I wish I was because it’s cold out. I need to at least get on the treadmill down stairs or something. Someone needs to get onto me so I will be more active!

This week on Thursday is my sugar test and regular ob appointment and another growth scan! Needless to say it will be a busy day. I have never had any issues with the glucose test except once I failed by a couple points and had to do the 3 hour one but I passed that. I think that was with Grace maybe. I’m crossing all my fingers and toes that this last pregnancy stays the same and everything will go just as smoothly. I feel so lucky that with 6 pregnancy’s everything has always been so smooth and basically easy for me. I just want to continue the last one that way! So everyone pray, send good vibes whatever you like to do. ❤️ All in all things are really going well here.

How’s Baby Mac?

Your little one is now 13-14 inches long, the size of a cabbage, and weighs about 1.7 pounds (785 grams). Baby Mac’s hair is thickening, just like yours. And even if you can’t see it, they probably have a hair color by now, though this can sometimes change after your baby is born. Baby Mac’s nostrils are starting to open and the air sacs in lungs continue to develop, priming them to breathe air in just a couple of short months.

What’s new with you?

As you approach the third trimester, this may be when some more unsavory symptoms of pregnancy begin to manifest, including gas, constipation, and hemorrhoids. 25-35% of pregnant women experience hemorrhoids because of their uterus pressing down on veins in the rectum. Kegels and avoiding constipation through exercise, hydration, and adequate fiber intake may help to prevent them. Gas is common, and may be harder to control than it normally would be, because pregnancy tends to slow down your gastrointestinal tract because of all the extra progesterone in your system and because your larger uterus has now grown to put more pressure on your abdominal cavity. Gas is inevitable for a lot of pregnant folks, but paying attention to your diet could help a bit — you may want to avoid fried foods, carbonated drinks, or any foods that you notice to be a particular trigger for you. You should also take care to hydrate, eat slowly, and chew thoroughly.

Your hormones may be acting up again, which could leave your whole body aching. These aches can be hard to avoid entirely, but there are some ways to limit them. Like a lot of things about pregnancy, when it comes to feeling good, sticking with the basics can really help: like eating a range of nutritious foods that help you feel your best, including fruits and vegetables, exercising or engaging in movement that you enjoy, and getting the rest that you need. It’s also time to start bending with your knees and engaging your core muscles instead of leaning over at your waist when you lean down to pick things up, because even simple motions like this can put a lot of extra strain on your back. And try to relax as much as you can. Maybe take a warm bath, listen to a meditation or favorite album, or ask a partner or loved one to give you a gentle massage — anything you can do to help yourself have a calm and relaxed pregnancy.

So cute!
How is this even possible! Only 14 weeks left 😍

22 weeks is she still a girl???

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Yesterday we had had our big ultrasound! Karen and Rodger came in Wednesday for the festivities. We had a wonderful dinner at Charlie Gittos my favorite St. Louis restaurant. My family dressed nice even the kids! We didn’t even get a picture. Surprise surprise. Sometimes I think not having pictures means we had even more fun because we are so wrapped up in conversation and fun that we don’t think of anything else. So it’s memory pictures we will have to remember. ❤️ Ricky was stopped and asked if he was a famous star from Top chef! 😂 Our waiter was incredible and just swore it was him. We looked the guy up and there was a resemblance! The kids thought that was just great. I really wanted baby Mac to move so Karen could try to feel because the other night Ricky said he could feel it! Apparently baby Mac enjoyed dinner so much that it was straight to bed! I was so excited to get home to sleep I was beyond full and sleepy.

So Thursday morning our appointment was at 9:30 am. I don’t really like early appointments. I feel more rushed but it was fine. Baby Mac was moving and kicking like CRAZY during my ultrasound even the tech could feel it. They went ahead to re check and make sure she was still a girl and she definitely was! That would have been quite a surprise and shock if we had seen something different lol. She was moving so much she put on a great show. She was so precious and perfect. We even saw her sucking her fingers! They said her size was perfect and right on track. She was estimated at one pound and 3 ounces. ❤️❤️❤️

You guys are not going to believe this but it looks like I have a two vessel cord AGAIN this time! How weird is that. Thankfully I know because of last time that it’s nothing to worry about it just means I get more ultrasounds and appointments to go to. I won’t complain about getting to see her cute face more often. I’m honestly wondering if this is more common in ivf or it really can just be a fluke and happed to me two times in a row?

They also said at 36 weeks they want me to do non stress tests. Basically I will go in once a week and be hooked up to monitors and they will just watch her I guess and make sure we are all good to go. It was funny though because she said it was because of ivf pregnancy but as we know my last 5 pregnancy’s were ivf and I have never had these before. 😆 Weird but I’ll be there. After the appointment we left and went to the hospital for a hospital tour. They showed us the birthing room and told us they will do their best to get us rooms close together. I made sure to get a cup of that great ice before I left! All in all we had a great time. It’s so exciting to be getting so close. Today I have a regular appointment with Dr Sammons. Oh I almost forgot to mention baby is also already head down. Well at least so far! She obviously has lots of wiggle room and can be switching it up any time but I hope for my sake she stays like this.

Let’s see what baby Mac is doing this week.

How’s Baby Mac?

Baby Mac is now just under a foot long — about the size of an ear of corn — and weighs just over a pound (478 grams). 

When Baby Mac isn’t sleeping the day away (which at this point is 12-14 hours a day), they’re trying to touch anything they can. Whether it’s their face, body, or umbilical cord, your baby is working on their physical abilities and motor skills by practicing movement and getting a feel for things. Your little one’s inner ear is also developing their sense of balance. While Baby Mac may not be using that sense of balance on any gymnastics equipment yet, the more their ears develop, the better the chance that your baby is hearing you when you talk, and learning your voice, so that when they arrive, they’ll recognize you!

Their eyes are still developing, and right now your little one still lacks pigment in their iris, so doesn’t have an eye color just yet. And his pancreas is already busy creating its own hormones, which helps alleviate all of the hormonal heavy-lifting you’ve been doing. 

What’s new with you?

Your feet and hands may be some of the next places to feel pregnancy’s side effects, as some swelling is not uncommon during these months. You might notice that any rings you wear on your fingers might start to feel tighter, and your feet could grow a whole size bigger. Wearing maternity compression stockings may help improve your circulation and reduce swelling in your feet and legs, in addition to helping with varicose veins if those have been an issue for you. 

And your expanding womb may have turned your “innie” into an “outie” by now. Don’t worry, it’ll go back to normal after you give birth. Your newly out-facing belly button might be a little sensitive, especially as it rubs against your clothes, but that’s generally nothing to worry about. If, on the other hand, it’s causing you pain, talk to your healthcare provider to make sure that you’re not dealing with an umbilical hernia. 

Really, as any strange symptoms or discomforts pop up for you, be sure to ask your provider about it. Even if there’s nothing wrong, it never hurts to know exactly what’s going on in your body, and it can help you feel better knowing that whatever’s going on is normal.

We celebrated Bo’s first birthday yesterday!
We needed a picture by the expectant mothers sign!
Mr. Shawn Brock from top chef. Who they thought Ricky was. 😆

Happy 9 weeks and 3 days

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How’s Baby Mac?

Happy 9 weeks. Things are going along pretty well. I’ve still been feeling pretty good. I have had a few days were I felt nauseous and just not good. But it hasn’t been to bad. My legs are also super crazy itchy from the meds I guess. So much so that I accidentally bruised myself pretty bad. I swear I didn’t think I was scratching that hard. Just 12 more days of meds. Not that I have a count down. 😂 I get asked alot how I’m feeling and I generally always say I feel good and fine. Because that’s generally true. We did have a scare last week though I had some slight spotting of brown blood. It’s never a good thing to see blood when you are pregnant. I tried to relax and not worry. I went to the dr and thankfully baby Mac was just fine in there. We didn’t get an explanation for what or why the bleeding happened. Thankfully since then I have had nothing though so that makes things much better!

I’ve had a couple people also ask about cravings. I guess I would say I am maybe craving soups? Lol I have been eating lots of soup the last week or two. I also always crave fruit in the beginning of my pregnancy’s. I’ve always loved fruit but, with each pregnancy I feel like I just want yummy ripe fruit all the time. Our next appointment is November 3rd. Karen is going to be in town for this one. I’m excited for her to be here. It feels like it’s been forever since I have seen her now. I’m thinking of all the fun St. Louis things to show her. Mostly food! 😆

Baby Mac is now almost an inch long (.9 inches), the size of a pecan, and though they’re not fully developed, all of their essential muscles and body parts are present. Your little one’s kidneys, liver, brain and lungs that are all starting to function on their own too, and they’re even starting to develop taste buds! Although Baby Mac’s eyes are forming more complex structures, their eyelids will shortly fuse shut for another four months or so. Your baby’s inner ear is also beginning to form the fluid that will allow them to develop a sense of balance. Baby Mac also has toes, bones in their arms, and joints that bend in their elbows.

Perhaps the most exciting part about week 9 is the increased likelihood that you may be able to hear Baby Mac’s heartbeat using a fetal doppler, a super special first for you and your little one. Baby Mac’s heart has been beating for a while now, but now it’s really starting to develop, forming distinct chambers and valves. They grow up so fast, don’t they?

My poor leg!

Last ultrasound before transfer!

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Ok today was our last ultrasound and blood work before transferring on the 30th! So just 7 days away. I’m happy to report everything looked good lining wise and we are just waiting for my blood work results to come back although I expect them to be fine also. My lining looked to be 14/15 in thickness this week so that’s good they want over a 8 I believe.

We had a great trip in Branson visiting our GG and the kids went back to school yesterday. I’m happy and sad. I love spending summers with the kids but I know they enjoy seeing friends and lord knows they need some structure and less snacks all day! 😂

Karen and I are both feeling excited and anxious. As to be expected I suppose. I still don’t know if I will test this time. My heart and brain are saying no right now at least. I haven’t even bought any tests this time. Usually by now I would have already had a stack ready to go. I’m still hurt by the fact that last time we were pregnant and then suddenly it all just went away. Talk about cruel. We all had the rug ripped from under us. It was just so sad.

I’ve still been doing my acupuncture twice a week and today’s session was my most relaxing yet! I honestly think I fell asleep a bit. I definitely didn’t think I would be able to relax that much knowing I had needles poking out of me. I told Heather my acupuncturist that these were the last two she would see me for and that now all the pressure is on her for our success! Haha She’s so sweet and said she would take all the pressure so I didn’t have it.

Karen already has appointments for me set up when I am in town for the acupuncture the day before and day of transfer. I’m happy to feel like we are doing everything we can to help this little embryo along. We will be transferring another girl this time. I’m praying my body is exactly what she needs and I can provide a soft, fluffy, cozy little home for her until she’s big enough to go live in her home with her mommy and daddy.

Today before I took Everett to school he was asking me if this would be the last baby I would have. I told him I think so as long as the baby sticks in my belly. He said mom you sure have had a lot of babies! I said I know but I really love to be pregnant and have babies. I asked him what he would have thought if I would have wanted that manny babies for our own family and we had to keep them all. He said well I think that’s too many babies for us. Lol he then said if I did have that many to keep he just wanted 4 boys and 4 girls so it could be even. Kids are just so fun.

Well now I’ll just wait for the all clear from Carrie at FCI in chicago. Once she says we are all good I’ll wean off my Lupron this week and I will be doing the big butt shots later this week and all the pills I have to take. Then I’ll fly out Monday and do the transfer on Tuesday. Remember the new motto!

✨TRANSFER THREE IS MEANT TO BE ✨

✨TRANSFER THREE IS MEANT TO BE✨

✨TRANSFER THREE IS MEANT TO BE✨

First ultrasound today.

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I’ve been on the Lupron but today was our first ultrasound and blood work. I got up got there. I was just expecting my usual when all the sudden she says oh well looks like you have a fibroid! I was shocked and didn’t know what to think. I immediately said well I bet this cycle is canceled. I have never had a fibroid as far as I know but I figured no way it was a good thing. My ultra sonographer was so sweet and did her best to talk me off my ledge. She explained that they are very common and that it was actually super tiny and not at all in the way of my lining. It was nice but I definitely was still upset. I even told her I probably wouldn’t see her next week. 😔

As soon as I got to the car I called Karen. I explained what they say and that the ultra sonographer was not worried but I really was. I was super upset because they made me be put under for the HSC procedure to check for any polyps scar tissue etc. this was literally 30 days ago and they said everything was all good and clear. How the heck does this just happen? I was honestly heart broken. I just felt like my body was giving up on us. I called Ricky and he was nice and too calm about it all. I just wanted someone else to also feel horrible about the news and to be sad and angry with me but he wasn’t. He told me there was only room for one of us to be all worried and worked up. That’s true and I’m glad he didn’t also freak out with me. It really wouldn’t have done me any good.

I went straight to acupuncture and was in tears. Going twice a week I feel like we are all besties there now. 😂 The girls were so kind and I explained what the ultrasound showed and Heather just listened and put in my needles. I closed my eyes and just rested and prayed. I prayed it would go away and that it wouldn’t be an issue for baby being able to implant. I prayed that we wouldn’t have to cancel it all and do more tests and procedures. I actually really did get to relax while I was there. I did feel more calm and at peace while I was laying there. I needed that because I was obnoxiously stressed and anxious at this point.

Once I was done I went to the car to come home and I decided to just call FCI and ask to talk to a nurse. Thankfully I was able to get through quickly and tell her what happened and ask her opinion. I knew she didn’t have the official report yet but I told her I just couldn’t wait all day waiting to hear if it was likely going to be bad news. So I told her everything I was told and waited for her to tell me what I just knew was the bad news coming our way. 😔

Much to my surprise she wasn’t surprised or shocked in the least. She said it was super common and that if didn’t sound like I should be worried at all. She said obviously she needed to see the report and have the DR go over it but that she didn’t expect it to be anything to worry about especially since we just did the HSC test. This was very reassuring for the time being. I called Karen and cried a bit because I was so relieved that my body was still ok and working hard for us.

I real take this so so seriously! It’s not lost on me how much trust these families have put into me. I just need to learn to not put so much pressure on myself. I know I can only do so much it’s just hard to remind myself of that. I had to wait a few more hours to wait for the other nurse to call me and really confirm all was ok. I let the doubts and anxiety slip back in. I always go to the worst case scenarios.

When she called I was of course with a client at work but she was so kind and let me answer. Thankfully they re confirmed all was still a go and that it was super super tiny and not of concern. I could have cried again. So in a few days now I will be adding in the estrogen to start bulking up and building my lining to a super thick and cozy home the new little embryo! I’m praying so hard that this little one is actually the one. The third times the charm!!!

I’m hoping at next week’s appointment my fibroid has just disappeared or that it at least stays small and doesn’t get in the way of anything. Thanks as usual to everyone for the thoughts and prayers during all this. It’s such a crazy roller coaster of emotions. I’ll update next week after our next appointment.

Additional testing

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So after our last failed transfer/chemical pregnancy our RE recommend a HSC test. This is where they put me under and insert a scope into my vagina and into my uterus. This is so they can see very clearly. They wanted to look for any polyps or scar tissue. If they find anything they could remove it while I was under. I had mixed feelings about doing the procedure. I was still sad and angry the last one didn’t work and the baby stopped growing. I know it’s good news that the baby attached obviously I can get pregnant she just wasn’t able to keep growing for some reason. The nurse explained to me that no matter how great the testing is there is only a 40/50 percent chance of the embryo sticking. She said while the testing has come so far and they can test for so many things they still have lots they can not test for. Karen said I could make the decision on doing the test or not but I knew if we didn’t do the test we would wonder and wish we had if another transfer failed.

We had already planned the trip to chicago for the 4th of July holiday. So we pushed for them to squeeze me in while I was already there. So July 5th Karen and I went for the procedure. I really felt calm and not worried. I didn’t think they would really see anything because I’ve never had any issues before. I wanted to be sure though. I didn’t want Karen and Rodger to waste time and money on transfers if for some reason it was me. The whole process was less then 20 mins. I had to recover from the anesthesia for longer then the test took! 😆 Karen got some really great videos of me. I was planning shopping trips to buy new purses and not telling Ricky. I also tried to get Karen to come snuggle with me under the warm blanket they brought. I was very excited about my Ginger ale soda and said it was extra good with a splash of vodka. So many funny things. The perks of this test was they know right away if there are issues or not. Thankfully all looked great. They said there was just a tiny spot and they went ahead and removed it but that all looked really good and that we should have no problems moving forward.

So we went out last night to celebrate the good news. I may have had one too many celebration drinks. 😂 We all just had such a great time. The kids loved Chicago and were sad to leave. Karen and Rodger were great hosts and we really enjoyed our stay. We did the Field Museum and the shed aquarium plus Ricky took the kids to see the bean! I was able to spend a few hours with Molly, Jon and the girls. We went to the zoo. We watched fireworks and ate lots of food too. All in all this trip was a great success. Now we wait and see when we can start meds again and try again. Say it with me. Third times the charm!!! I’ve never worked this hard to have a baby but we are committed and I’m ready for this next try. We have decided to try acupuncture to help as well. I have read some really promising studies on it with ivf. I will be meeting with an acupuncturist to see her recommendations.

I met with her this week and she has me going 2 times a week and will be focusing on reducing stress and working on all the perfect points to aid in our ivf journey! I also got an updated cycle calendar yesterday. So we have a new transfer date of August 30th. As I said before I have never needed to work this hard for a ivf cycle to work. I’m really hoping and praying that this next little embryo is the one God has planned for me to carry and grow until he or she is ready to meet his or her parents. We are all scared and excited. As always the emotions run high during these times. I’m honestly not sure if I’ll be testing this time. My heart is saying no but I also know I have like zero will power after. I can’t lie I’m just worried about another chemical. It really sucked seeing positive pregnancy tests and then being told We were not pregnant. I know these things happen and so many others have struggled with chemical pregnancy, ectopic pregnancies and blighted ovum’s. I never knew there could be so many things that could go wrong until I pursued surrogacy. It breaks my heart that so many struggle with things like this. I just have to keep praying that it’s Gods will for me to be able to help Karen and Rodger with their family. I can only imagine how sweet and satisfying it will be to see them with their baby on its first birthday! That’s why I know all these hormones and shots will be worth it. It’s always worth it when I see these families and all the love that goes into creating them. I’ll add some fun vacation pictures for you all.

Testing day
The kids LOVED the stair case 😂 hours of entertainment
That iPad…
Swimming
The 4th of July party on the 3rd 😂
This pizza
Sue the T. rex
Sweet Steven ❤️
Can you believe I birthed them all! Plus 2 more!

3 day past 6 day transfer

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I’m officially 3 days past the transfer at like 10 am today. I’m still in Chicago. I stayed in bed for two solid days. Day of transfer and the day after. Yesterday I ventured out and walked around. The weather was gorgeous low 70’s. I had some cramping the first day and a half I would say. Now nothing. It’s so hard knowing they put the embryo in and now you have to wait and over analyze every little thing. I have hours where I’m so at peace and confident that this time it’s the time. I feel like we had such a great transfer day. The embryo looked SO SO great and my lining was even thicker then last time. Plus the music gave me such comfort. It all seemed so meant to be. But then I also have too much time on my hands because I’m here alone 😂. That’s when my brain starts saying STOP you can’t be too excited Rashel. Sometimes it just doesn’t work. Then I spiral into what if it fails again. What if I take test after test and they are all white again. I will once again have to feel all the emotions while on all these crazy medications. Then I pick myself back up and say no stay positive. I know I have done everything perfectly. Taken all the meds and all the appointments looked great. My body has done everything it’s supposed to so that this little girl should want to stay. It’s now up to her, God and science!

I did finish my book and have watched some tv. Today is my last day in Chicago I go home tomorrow morning. Today is a BIG day for Karen she has been working hard for this fundraising event to help the boys and girls club. They will all get to wear gorgeous gowns and drink and dance the night away. Hopefully they raise lots of money from the auction to help the club. I get to go do hair for everyone tonight before they go out! I’m excited for that.

We decided to take our test tomorrow morning before I leave for the airport. I didn’t want to test today and her be sad or disappointed for the event she worked so hard for. Plus hopefully tomorrow we can have a stronger line on the test anyway. I keep visualizing there being two lines. We want it so bad. I know even if a line doesn’t show up tomorrow we would have time for it to show up but it sure would be nice to see it earlier. I really want Karen to have such great news.

Karen also gave me one of the best gifts ever while I was here. She is seriously too kind and a wonderful gift giver. She gave me a copy of a special poem that has significant meaning to her and Rodger. They always tell each other they have each other’s hearts and carry them. So then she gave me a heart necklace to Symbolize that I get to carry their baby’s heart! You guys 😭😭😭😭 it was so so beautiful. The meaning behind it is so incredibly beautiful. I am so lucky to be trusted with peoples most precious of things. Their babies! That will never be lost on me. I just keep praying so hard that this little girl is strong! That she can find a perfect cozy spot inside of me so that she can live and grow! So I can hold and protect her tiny heart until she’s big enough and ready to go to her mommy and daddy! I will keep this necklace on forever. ❤️🥰❤️

For a funny story yesterday Ricky told me that the cardinals were actually here in Chicago playing! I had no idea. So I was with Molly and I teased him that Molly just said I could go with them! (They always get season tickets and he knows it) I will upload the screen shots from our text. Let’s just say Ricky wasn’t happy that he didn’t get to go. 😂 But then when I got back to the room I had a delivery! It was an edible arrangement. Now I felt extra bad for the trick because I still hadn’t told him I wasn’t actually going to the game. Turns out he went to his physical therapy appointment and told everyone there how excited he was for me that I was going to a cards cubs game at Wrigley Field. 😆

So I will update everyone tomorrow at some point about our first test. Please PLEASE be praying and sending all your good thoughts and emotions our way. We need them. here are the fun pictures so far.

First messages!
Second message and then he FaceTimed us! 😂
I just happened to have packed one cards shirt so I put it on to show him I was going! 😂
My delicious delivery
❤️😘❤️
The poem. ❤️😭❤️
It’s so so pretty
It’s perfect!!!

Transfer day try number 2!

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I flew in yesterday alone. Ricky couldn’t come with me this time. I was a little sad but honestly a hotel all alone is kind of a nice thought as a mom. I brought two books and hoping to finish at least one. Last night I spent the night enjoying margaritas and wine with the girls. We laughed and laughed for hours and ate yummy food. It was a perfect night to keep busy and keep my mind off things. I got back to the hotel by like 10ish. I fell right asleep! (Thanks wine) 😂 I kept waking up all night though checking the time and having super weird dreams. I finally got up at 5 am and took a bath. This is a different hotel but also has a wonderful bath tub. I’m really going to need to invest in a bathtub for home. I got out and tried to lay back down. Surprisingly I fell asleep for another hour or so.

I got up to get ready and turned on my Christian radio on my phone. Almost immediately my favorite song came on and I sat on the floor and had a really good crying and praying session. Then the next song was even more impactful. I hate being emotional and crying but on things like this it’s all just TOO important. Im praying so so hard this time is it. This little girl needs to dig in deep so she can come meet us all in 9 plus months. She’s so very loved and wanted. I’ll include links to the songs if you want to listen. These are the order they came came on.

https://youtu.be/FW5o2uBeMWQ

https://youtu.be/YqHjjZz1Syg

This song was so so good and needed this morning.

Im still surprised by how perfect the songs were this morning when I needed them most. Today our plan is coming back to rest and order room service. Watch tv or a movie or read or nap or anything we want! Karen is going to be here in like 8 mins so I need to get down stairs. I’ll update later when I can.

It’s too risky to get sick now!
How sweet was this from the hotel. ❤️
Such a fun night full of laughter and fun.

Now I’m back in the room. Transfer is over. I was STARVING after so Karen and I ordered room service and it was super yummy. I decided to nap after so I slept for almost 3 hours. 😂😳 That’s a hefty nap even for me. I have been on the pio shots now for awhile and it makes your body think it’s pregnant so I know it’s making me extra sleepy too. For some exciting news: I for the first time gave myself my own BUTT SHOT!!! I decided since Ricky couldn’t come that I would be brave and try myself. Actually it was SO much easier and better when I do them myself. I can’t believe after all these years and transfers I’ve finally done them myself. I think because I’m doing it the anticipation isn’t so bad. So woohoo for me. My butt is still sore and lumpy from the meds but the actual injection itself isn’t so bad now that I’m doing them. Just getting the angle part right is hard. I have to be a pro contortionist 😂.

So now we will wait and hope and pray this little girl is sticking in there. I believe Karen and I will test again before I leave but I’m leaving it up to her. As for now we are staying positive and hopeful. The baby girl embryo looked so so good. She was hatching a lot even the Dr made note of how great it looked.

Look I’m getting pregnant! 😂
Look at this little lady go! GROW BABY GROW!
This is the video of the actual transfer. I know I’ve had people ask what they actually do. ❤️

My last 2 appointments

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Well I didn’t update after my last one. 😂 Sorry guys. My last appointment was last Wednesday my lining thickness was 14! Again I only need to be at a 10 anymore is just a bonus. So today when I went in I was at about 18 she said. This is even thicker then last transfer so I’m hoping this will be extra helpful for baby girl to snuggle in deep.

This week we went to the zoo and we had a great time with the kids. I tried to convince Ricky to take me and the kids to Disney this weekend before my transfer but he said no and when I looked up the parks we couldn’t even get in to the ones I wanted to go to. 😂 So I guess my idea won’t happen. Our Puppy Bo Bear is getting super big and still learning and eating all the things he shouldn’t. Like leaves, sticks, mulch and paper. Good news he’s so cute we love him anyway.

Im excited for my blood work to come back and see what my estrogen is at because I know it’s super HIGH. I can cry just thinking about crying. 😭 😂 I have cried watching silly tv shows and I almost cried at the zoo yesterday. I don’t even remember why that’s how emotional I am right now. The silliest things just put me over the edge.

I’ll wait for FCI (the fertility clinic) to call me today with their update and then on Monday I will be flying out to Chicago. Karen and I are so excited to try again I have everything crossed and so many prayers that this time it will work. I need to see a positive pregnancy test this time! If I’m looking for up sides I’ll get to go back to Chicago and see my friends and enjoy a nice hotel stay without the kids and Ricky. I will get to sleep in and order food or go shopping 🛍 on Michigan Avenue! I’m sure I will come up with plenty to do. I can also finish reading my book I started.

I’ll update everyone on transfer day. Keep the prayers and good thoughts coming our way!

This was last weeks at 14 for thickness
Blood work from last week
Today’s lining at 18ish 😍
My sweet message from Ricky before my appointment today
Look how big this dog is getting!

Today we start again.

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Today is the day I start meds again. I will be starting the Lupron shots again tonight. This is the drug that puts my body into menopause. So I get super rage and all the other stuff. Like night sweats, insomnia and other fun stuff. Karen said I can call her and rage whenever I need too. 😆

I will go for lining check and blood work for the next 3 weeks and then I will fly out on the 30th for our transfer on the 31st! So just 29 days until transfer. I’m really hoping and praying this little girl sticks this time. I’m going to make sure to tell Dr Kaplan to push her in a little deeper this time. 😂 I will stay a few days after like last time and we will test together again before I leave.

It really REALLY sucked last time testing together and not getting a positive but I also know just how incredible and exciting it will be if we test together and we do get a positive so that’s what I’m really hoping happens this time. Ricky won’t be able to go with me this time. I have mixed emotions about it. 😂 Down side he won’t be there to spend time with when I’m bored… He also will not be able to give me my shots. Karen said she’s going to be brave and do them! I know she will do fine. The perks of Ricky not going are I get to be in a hotel room alone! I can watch what I pick, eat when I want and nap and shop when I want! No husband to say I don’t think you need that do you… 😆 I mean does anyone really NEED anything?

My Birthday is 6/8 and I’m telling everyone all I want for my birthday this year is to get pregnant with Karen and Rodgers baby! Plus any other gifts people decide they must get me. Im a size 12 days at the beach kinnda girl. 😆 So hopefully God willing this transfer will work just fine and then on 6/10 will be our first blood test to check for beta numbers. They typically like to see around 100 or more. I’ve always had a big mix of numbers. Ellie was my lowest at like 70 something and then I have had some pretty high ones where I was like oh crap what if this little one split into twins! I won’t lie that’s always my big fear.

Twins would be exciting and I would do my very best but I would just worry selfishly about me not being able to work as much and honestly just keeping two babies healthy in there. I know I’m a pro with one! I’ll post a picture of my med calendar so you all can see how crazy and in depth this stuff is. I read it each morning and each night just to make sure I am doing everything properly. I don’t want to mess anything up.

As always thanks for the continued thoughts and prayers for the baby, parents and me! Don’t forget to pray for Ricky and my kids who have a bit of a crazy rage mom for a few weeks. 😂

Say it with me: This time is the right time, this time baby girl is going to dig in deep and my body is ready to help her grow. 🥰